AITA for saying it's not my problem if my ex and her husband can't afford their kids?
The narrator, a 30-year-old male, was married to Marin (30f) and they had a son. During the pregnancy, the narrator discovered Marin was cheating with James (33m), who also had a pr****nt girlfriend.
Following the son's birth, a DNA test confirmed the narrator was the father, despite Marin wanting James listed.
This period was marked by high tension, as James was present for the birth while the narrator received updates from Marin's parents, leading directly into divorce proceedings and custody action.
The situation evolved over the years, with the narrator gaining full custody of his son 3.5 years ago due to Marin and James neglecting the child's basic needs to pressure the narrator for more money.
Currently, Marin has limited visitation, and she has a history of failing to pay court-ordered child support.
Recently, Marin approached the narrator asking him to purchase school supplies for her two daughters with James, which led to a heated confrontation where the narrator refused, questioning his responsibility to those children. The narrator now wonders if his firm refusal and harsh words were justified.
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The original poster (OP) is currently in a firm position, prioritizing the well-being of his son above all else, especially given his ex-wife's past history of financial manipulation and neglect toward their child.
The central conflict lies between the OP’s clear boundary—that he is financially responsible only for his biological son—and his ex-wife's persistent attempts to draw him into supporting her current family structure, leading to accusations of being a bad father.
The debate centers on whether the OP was justified in his blunt refusal and sharp comments when asked to financially support his ex-wife's other children, considering the history of a**se against his son.
Should the OP maintain absolute financial separation and ignore the pleas, or does the shared history and the nature of the request warrant a more diplomatic, albeit still non-committal, response to maintain minimal co-parenting civility?
When the Crowd Speaks, It Echoes Loudly:
Users didn’t stay quiet — they showed up in full force, mixing support with sharp criticism. From calling out bad behavior to offering real talk, the comments lit up fast.