AITA for keeping no contact with my sister after her husband (my ex) died?
When the original poster (OP) was 14, she began dating Jace, who was 15. She had a close friendship with her older sister, Lauren, and believed they shared everything.
This trust was broken when Lauren and Jace began cheating on the OP together, which eventually resulted in Lauren becoming pregnant.
The OP was initially supportive of Lauren until the truth was revealed to their parents, leading to the breakup with Jace, who preferred Lauren.
Despite Lauren's pleas for forgiveness and a desire to remain close, the OP cut ties, finding relief when Lauren moved in with Jace's family.
When parental pressure to forgive Lauren and resume the sisterly relationship failed, the OP moved out at 18 and initiated a period of no contact with both Lauren and Jace, a boundary she has maintained for years despite family disagreement.
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The crowd poured into the comments, bringing a blend of heated opinions, solid advice, and a few reality checks along the way.
The central conflict for the OP is the deep betrayal felt from her sister, which led her to enforce strict, long-term no contact, a decision that has been consistently supported by her grandmother but heavily criticized by other family members.
Now, with the unexpected death of Jace, the OP feels significant guilt over maintaining this distance, worrying that her actions are causing emotional strain on Lauren, even though she still views the initial betrayal as unforgivable.
The question is whether the OP is wrong (the 'Asshole') for continuing her no contact boundary with Lauren following Jace's death, or if the severity of the original betrayal justifies prioritizing her own healing over familial reconciliation at this time?
Readers must weigh the impact of a formative, severe betrayal against the social expectation to forgive and support a sibling after a tragedy.