The original poster (OP), a 27-year-old woman, has a long-standing disagreement with her mother regarding cohabitation rules during family visits.
When OP was in college and living with her boyfriend, the couple es**blished a tradition of alternating Christmases between their respective families.
The conflict first arose when OP's mother insisted that her boyfriend could not stay at her house or share a room, leading OP to book separate accommodation.
This initial incident es**blished a precedent where OP refused future visits under those restrictive terms. Years later, after the death of OP's father and her mother beginning a new relationship, the dynamic has reversed.
When the mother requested a visit with her new boyfriend, OP set the same boundary she had been forced to accept previously: no sharing a room or bed in OP's home.
The mother reacted with anger, accusing OP of pettiness, leaving OP unsure if her boundary enforcement is fair given the history.













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The OP is currently in a difficult emotional position, balancing her desire for a relationship with her mother against the need to maintain consistency in the boundaries she previously fought to es**blish for herself.
The core conflict stems from the mother's past rigid enforcement of her own household rules, which the OP is now mirroring in her own home, leading to accusations of being childish.
The central question remains whether the OP is justified in applying the exact same terms to her mother's visit that her mother once applied to her adult relationship, or if this response crosses the line into unproductive retaliation.
Readers must consider if es**blishing clear, reciprocal boundaries in adult family relationships outweighs the potential cost of alienating the mother.
The Comments Section Came Alive:
What started as a simple post quickly turned into a wildfire of opinions, with users chiming in from all sides.