AITA for expecting my husband to be home every night that we have his kids (my stepkids) at home?
The user, who is married to a man with two teenage sons from a previous relationship, describes their current family living situation.
After moving 60 miles away last summer to be cl**er to the boys' biological mother, the family now has a 50/50 custody arrangement.
During the school year, the user's husband uses Mondays and Tuesdays, when he does not have the children, to travel and play in low-stakes poker games near the old house, staying overnight with friends.
The conflict arose when the summer custody schedule was discussed. The husband expected to continue his Tuesday night poker tradition even during his weeks with the children.
The user stated she is very uncomfortable being solely responsible for the two rambunctious boys, especially since she feels it is not her place to discipline them when they fight, which happens frequently.
When the user objected, the husband suggested her expectation that he be home during their custody weeks was unreasonable, leaving the user questioning if her boundary request is fair.
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The core conflict centers on the user's boundary regarding solo parenting responsibility during the husband's chosen hobby time while they have custody of his sons.
The user feels she is already the primary caregiver for most logistical tasks, especially during school breaks, and views her request for the husband's presence on his custody nights as a reasonable expectation of parenting commitment, especially when compared to his preference for leisure activities.
The central question is whether the husband is justified in prioritizing his weekly poker game over being present at home during the one week he has the children, or if the user is making an overly demanding request by expecting him to set aside this hobby during his parenting time.
Should parenting duties during shared custody take precedence over personal hobbies requiring overnight absence?
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