My gf (20F) wants me (20M) to meet up with her best friend (20M) to discuss who gets to be in her life

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The Original Poster (OP) has been dating his girlfriend for approximately seven months. Early in the relationship, the girlfriend developed a very close, singular friendship with another man after going through an emotional difficulty.

As their anniversary approaches, the OP has grown increasingly uncomfortable with the depth and nature of this friendship.

The discomfort stems from the girlfriend stating the friend understands her better than the OP, lying about her whereabouts with the friend, and admitting the friend's appeal to a third party.

When the OP presented an ultimatum—either he or the friend must be prioritized—the girlfriend revealed the friend gave a similar ultimatum.

Her proposed solution is for the OP and the friend to meet and decide together who remains in her life, leaving the OP questioning the appropriateness and severity of this situation.

My gf (20F) wants me (20M) to meet up with her best friend (20M) to discuss who gets to be in her life
‘My gf (20F) wants me (20M) to meet up with her best friend (20M) to discuss who gets to be in her life’

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Commenters Came in Hot with Their Takes:

The community had thoughts — lots of them. From tough love to thoughtful advice, the comment section didn’t disappoint.

The central conflict for the OP is rooted in a perceived imbalance of emotional priority within the relationship, exacerbated by the girlfriend's apparent inability or refusal to set clear boundaries with her close friend.

While the OP aims for maturity, the emotional pain caused by the friend's influence and the girlfriend's proposed resolution highlights a serious challenge to the foundation of trust and commitment in their partnership.

The reader must consider whether the girlfriend's demand for the OP to negotiate his standing with a rival is a reasonable expectation in a committed relationship, or if this entire scenario, including the friend's direct interference, const*tutes an insurmountable red flag that demands the OP prioritize his own well-being.