AITAH For not getting on an elevator with only a woman on it?
The Original Poster (OP), a 25-year-old man, consistently avoided sharing an elevator with a specific woman in his apartment building for about two weeks during his weekday commute.
This behavior stemmed from advice OP received from his mother intended to prevent making women uncomfortable, which included instructions to never enter an elevator if a woman is alone inside.
The OP chose to consistently take the stairs, an extra minute or two of travel time, whenever he saw this woman already in the elevator.
The immediate aftermath occurred when he encountered the woman's friend, who accused him of being a 'd**k' for making her friend feel bad and demanded an apology, claiming the OP's actions were damaging the woman's self-esteem. The OP is now confused and questions what he missed or did wrong in this situation.
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The core conflict for the OP lies between his es**blished safety precaution, rooted in a desire to respect potential boundaries, and the unexpected negative interpretation of his actions by the woman and her friend.
While the OP intended to be considerate by avoiding an awkward situation, his consistent avoidance behavior was perceived by the other party as a deliberate slight or judgment against the woman.
The central question is whether the OP's precautionary measure, based on general advice about stranger interaction, const*tutes an actionable offense when it leads to negative feelings in the other person.
Readers must weigh the OP's good intentions against the impact of his avoidance: Was avoiding potential discomfort for himself worth causing perceived isolation or offense to the woman, or was the friend's reaction an overreach based on a misunderstanding?
When the Crowd Speaks, It Echoes Loudly:
The thread exploded with reactions. Whether agreeing or disagreeing, everyone had something to say — and they said it loud.