AlTA for refusing to share my daughter's 27 Christmas gifts with her half-brother who got 1.
The original poster (OP) shares custody of his 7-year-old daughter, Zara, with his ex-partner, with whom he has a strictly co-parenting relationship due to past issues, including in***elity by the ex.
When Zara's Christmas birthday approached, the OP purchased 20 gifts for her, alongside gifts from his brother and the ex.
The ex, facing financial strain, requested that the OP allow them to spend Christmas together as a whole family unit, framing it as Zara’s wish.
Although Zara agreed to the visit only if her half-brother did not interfere with her belongings, the situation escalated immediately upon the ex and her son arriving.
Upon seeing the large number of presents intended only for Zara, the ex became angry, demanding that the OP's daughter share her gifts with her son.
When the OP refused to force his daughter to share her presents, the ex reacted with verbal a**se, accusing him of malice.
The OP is now questioning if he was wrong for prioritizing his daughter's gifts and enforcing her boundaries over his ex's demands.
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The OP is facing a conflict between honoring the specific boundaries set with his daughter regarding her personal property and managing the volatile reaction of his narcissistic ex-partner during a shared holiday.
While the OP feels some guilt that the situation negatively impacted the ex's son, his primary justification rests on fulfilling his promise to Zara and protecting her possessions from interference.
The central debate revolves around the allocation of resources and emotional expectations during a holiday visit arranged primarily for the child's benefit.
Should the OP have anticipated and accommodated the ex's financial difficulties by sharing Zara's gifts, or was he entirely justified in upholding his daughter's es**blished boundaries against an unreasonable demand made by the visiting parent?
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