AITA for not getting my sister something while she was on her period, and insulting her?
In the fragile quiet of a room weighed down by illness, a young man holds his girlfriend close, watching over her as chemotherapy saps her strength and steals her sleep.
His heart aches with the helplessness of seeing her endure such pain, yet he remains steadfast, choosing to cherish these small moments of togetherness amidst the storm.
But even in these tender hours, the world outside presses in harshly—family tensions flare over something as simple as a glass of water, revealing the strain that illness can place not just on the body, but on the bonds that hold loved ones together.
In this fragile balance, compassion and conflict collide, leaving him caught between care and confrontation.
My (19m) gf (19f) has cancer. She's been really sensitive to the chemo and her meds so she is really weak, but sometimes she's also sore so she hasn't been sleeping much.
This has been a big issue for her as it just makes the chemo and recovery worse.
She had a chemo session on Friday early in the morning and she came over to my place so we could hang out and I could take care of her.
She ended up passing out on me and before she fell asleep was telling me about how she was feeling bad overall. I was happy she was resting and didn't want to wake her up.
My sister (16f) was on her period She texted me to ger some water. Our other sister (14f) was at the store and would be home in like 5 minutes.
Because my gf was asleep on me I didn't want to wake her up I told her to wait. She said she didn't want to wait and told me to ger her water.
I told her no, and explained that my gf was asleep and that I wasn't going to wake her up. We went back and forth untill my sister called me a lazy fucking bitch.
I told her that I wasn't going to wake her up to get fucking water, I'm going to care for my gf. She then said that she didn't care abt my stupid gf. I told her to fuck off, and I called her a bitch.
(that was all over text btw) She told me I was a dick, and has ignored me any time I've tried speaking to her and I talked about this with our other sister who says I over-reacted and that I should apologize and that I should have just gotten her water.
I'm starting to feel that I over-reacted and I also believe that maybe I should have gotten her the water,
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THE COMMENTS SECTION WENT WILD – REDDIT HAD *A LOT* TO SAY ABOUT THIS ONE.:
The community had thoughts — lots of them. From tough love to thoughtful advice, the comment section didn’t disappoint.
Alert_Benefit9755 - :- This is about as far as it goes with this sister I think.
I (48M) get period nonsense (spouse with likely endometriosis but won't do anything about it, MIL had massive endometriosis plus it's all through that branch of the family, SIL (on my side) with PCOS). It can be truly debilitating.
I choose to make sure that my wife and daughter are as comfortable as possible during that time (mostly by knowing where the heat packs are and stocking the fridge with chocolate), but there are times I just can't because other things are more important.
You prioritised your GF over your sister - given the history here I personally feel that you made absolutely the right choice, and one that I would have made.
Periods aren't a free pass to order people around as you wish - both of your sisters need to learn that, yesterday.
Sweet_Vanilla46 - :- NTA I am almost 50, since I had my tubes tied during my last c section my period has been next level heavy and painful. I drive a school bus. Ask me how many times I have missed work for my period.
Save you the trouble, the answer is none. I drive a rural run, complete with dirt roads that are more pothole than road, bouncing along for almost 8 hours a day. She can get her own damn water.
Even if your gf who is going through chemo wasn’t on you sleeping, she could still get her damn water. Have I ever asked my husband or my now teens to grab me a drink when I’m hurting?
Sure, but if they aren’t around, or busy in the moment I get my own damn water. She’s weaponizing a basic biological function that most women contend with and being dramatic about it. And she has learned this behavior.
Because I’ll tell you right now, at the age of 16 if I were lying down, acting like I was dying, ordering people to get me water the responses would have been anywhere from complete mirth at my audacity, to being given chores if I got rude about it.
You can’t even get a glass of water and want to bitch people out about it? Go clean the bathroom. Good grief the newer generations are soft.
desertprincess69 - :- “Oh, brother of mine ! Please, wake the cancer patient as to fetch me a glass of water ! For I am on my *period* as an otherwise perfectly healthy girl of 16 ! I shant possibly wait for sister to arrive in 5 minutes time ! Go, go now, you peasant !” NTA
inferache - :- This has got to be the most annoying comment section to read because of that one person's insistence on posting the endometriosis PSA. We get it holy fuck. It's on almost every single comment 😭
Big_Bread6874 - :- NTA your gf literally has cancer. That is much more serious than a period. I get awful cramps but I can still go get myself things if my husband isn’t available
ClackamasLivesMatter - :- NTA. Unless you left out some pretty significant details, a sixteen-year-old girl can get her own water or cope with being thirsty. Also, you don't always have to text back when someone messages you. Leave the fucker on read. They'll figure it out.
CivilAsAnOrang - :- NTA. But I guess I don’t understand why you got in a weird back and forth. Just ignore her silly texts. She’s not sinking in quicksand. ”I can’t get you water. Bye.”
The individual faced a difficult situation where the intense needs of his ill girlfriend directly conflicted with the immediate demands of his younger sister.
He prioritized the delicate state of his girlfriend, who was resting after chemotherapy, over his sister's request for water, leading to a severe argument characterized by harsh language from both sides.
Given the high stress and emotional volatility surrounding a serious illness, was the priority correctly placed on the sleeping patient, or did the expectation of immediate service to a sibling outweigh the need to maintain peace and support the primary caregiver role? Where does the line for reasonable accommodation fall in a crisis?