AITA for refusing to invite any of my parent's exes to my wedding even if that means none of my half siblings will come?
Bound by blood but divided by history, a young man stands at the crossroads of family and individuality. His parents' fractured pasts have woven a complex tapestry of relationships, half-siblings, and exes, none of whom feel like family to him.
The idea of merging these scattered pieces into one celebration feels like a betrayal of his own truth. As wedding plans unfold, he faces an emotional battleground where loyalty and love collide.
His parents insist on blending all the fractured parts into one big family, but for him and his sister, the wedding is a sacred space—one that must honor the family they truly know, not the tangled web of their parents' pasts.
My parents divorced many years ago. They have me (27m) and my sister (29f) together. After their divorce they both had a few on and off again relationships.
My mom has 2 exes and 5 kids between them and her on and off thing with them went right up until she started dating the brother to one of them. My dad has 3 exes and 8 kids between them.
It's been longer since he had an actual relationship with them. I do not have a relationship with any of the exes involved. They are not third, fourth, fifth parents to me or anything close.
I can't say I have much of a relationship with my half siblings either other than seeing them on occasion.
But they want their other parents invited to my wedding or they won't come and my mom and dad think this is a great idea. They talk about it being one big family anyway. But it isn't.
At least not to me it isn't. My sister feels the same but it's not her wedding either.
I said there are no exes invited to the wedding and all complaints from my half siblings went to the shared parent and both my parents are saying it's groomzilla behavior and weddings are meant to be about bringing families together.
When I said my wedding is for us and our families and their exes are not part of it they pointed out my half siblings are and none will come without an invite to their other parent.
I said that is for my half siblings to decide and I will accept their answers. AITA?
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AFTER THIS STORY DROPPED, REDDIT WENT INTO MELTDOWN MODE – CHECK OUT WHAT PEOPLE SAID.:
The internet jumped in fast, delivering everything from kind advice to cold truth. It’s a mix of empathy, outrage, and no-nonsense takes.
Putrid-Pepper-6810 - :- NTA. And why do the parents and the half siblings feel so strongly about this anyway yet they don't have a relationship with you or with each other?
Fancy-Meaning-8078 - :- Your right. Your parents want a reunion. To see how everyone is. It's not up to you to finance or facilitate a reunion. This is your wedding. Not the Oprah show. Your half siblings are at best casual acquaintances.
You didn't grow up with them. You didn't share experiences with them. They are not even friends. Just friendly. Their other parents are irrelevant to your life. Nta
Visual-Lobster6625 - :- NTA - do your half-siblings get a plus one? Careful they may try to bring their parent that route. Threatening to not go to your wedding if their parent isn't invited is just emotional blackmail. Leave them all off the guest list and save that much more money.
MrTitius - :- NTA. It’s your wedding invite whomever use wish. If they choose not to come then you know where you stand with them and you can move forward appropriately with that understanding.
LoranaPastius - :- NTA: your wedding isn’t a family reunion for your parents. So many exes there could be drama or just a bunch of awkward questions from other guests.
Even if there isn’t, the day is about celebrating your new family with the ones you love. Stick to your ground OP.
Exciting-Argument-67 - :- If this is real (sorry, I have my doubts), make a will ASAP, girl. Do it tomorrow.
Because if you and your new husband should, God forbid, die together in an accident, and your parents are gone at that point, and you don't have kids, your half siblings are entitled to an equal share of your estate as your one full sibling, in many states.
In other states they're entitled to 50% as much as her. That is if there is no will and it's carved up by the state.
Anybody reading this who has half siblings they're not close to and full siblings they are close to, and the chance there will someday be no parents and no kids—make your will.
FinancialCamel7281 - :- Nta this is your wedding, not a family reunion which is what your parents an other flying monkeys are trying to turn it into. Stick to your guns, those that refuse will make it cheaper on you
The individual hosting the wedding is facing significant pressure from both parents and half-siblings regarding the guest list, specifically concerning the inclusion of former partners of the parents.
The core conflict lies in the groom's belief that his wedding should only include his immediate family unit and his fiancée's family, clashing directly with his parents' desire to merge all affiliated family members, including ex-partners, into one celebratory group.
Should the groom stand firm on his boundary to exclude his parents' ex-partners to maintain the focus of the event, even if it means his half-siblings will not attend, or is the social expectation of maintaining familial harmony at a wedding important enough to concede and invite individuals with whom he has no close relationship?