AITA for not letting a homeless woman in my apartment?
After years of enduring the harsh reality of homelessness, a glimmer of hope finally appeared when she secured an apartment on the Southside of Chicago.
But even in her newfound refuge, the scars of hardship lingered, as she faced the heart-wrenching choice between compassion and the fear of losing everything she had fought so hard to regain.
One cold, dark evening, a desperate homeless woman’s plea for warmth and shelter stirred a deep empathy within her.
Torn between kindness and the harsh rules that governed her fragile stability, she wrestled with the haunting question: should she risk everything to offer a stranger the comfort she once longed for, or protect the fragile sanctuary she had finally claimed?
My homelessness is a very, very long story, but very recently I've gotten an apartment with the help of the city and I now live on the Southside of Chicago.
After a long day of work when it's now cold and dark, a homeless woman I felt sorry for asked and begged me to let her in my apartment saying she needed to be somewhere warm and to charge her phone.
I couldn't help but have deep empathy but at the same time didn't want to get in trouble with my landlord due to having past bad experiences or risk getting taken advantage of.
She ended up begging and saying how cold it was outside and I made the hard decision to leave her there, should I have let her stay the night in my apartment or at least the lobby? I was thinking of the latter but don't want to risk pissing off the neighbors or my landlord.
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THIS STORY SHOOK THE INTERNET – AND REDDITORS DIDN’T HOLD BACK.:
The crowd poured into the comments, bringing a blend of heated opinions, solid advice, and a few reality checks along the way.
ruyrybeyro - :- NTA. It’s a tough situation, but you have to protect your living situation. Helping her another way, like pointing her to a shelter, would’ve been a safer choice. You’ve got to look after yourself first.
Bluebells7788 - :- NTA - you wanting to protect your housing is fair. Also you don't know this stranger so have no idea what could have happened.
holly1231 - :- NTA—you have to protect your own housing situation first. You can’t help other homeless if you become homeless again. It’s heart wrenching, but it’s sadly how it works.
Ed-Lyne1988 - :- NTA. There was a story in Portland last year of a good Samaritan who let a homeless person into their house to shower and they ended up stabbing them.
You have to protect your situation and maybe you can commit to helping others when you are fully sorted.
StAlvis - :- NAH You're just barely on your feet. Maybe one day you will be in a better position to help others, but that doesn't have to be today.
White_eagle32rep - :- NTA. You have to think about your own safety. Most cities or towns have shelters or somewhere these people can go.
pinksocks867 - :- NTA. I let a woman in and she seemed so chill until she drank all my wine and beer while I was sleeping and started screaming at me. Police had her leave and she kept sending crazy texts like I was family or it was my fault she was outside.
The original poster experienced a conflict between deep empathy for a vulnerable person and the need to protect their new, hard-won housing stability.
The decision to deny entry, while driven by fear of landlord issues and past negative experiences, resulted in leaving someone in immediate, harsh weather conditions.
Given the immediate need for warmth versus the tenant's legitimate concern for tenancy rules, was the original poster obligated to offer a compromise like lobby access, or was prioritizing the security of their housing situation the only responsible choice?