Her sister’s carefree disregard for her promises shattered the fragile sense of security, leaving the young babysitter isolated and overwhelmed by panic. When the truth finally emerged, it was a cruel betrayal—a selfish party that ignored the chaos left behind, dismissing the young girl’s anguish with cold commands to be silent. Now, with a heavy heart and shattered trust, she escapes the suffocating nightmare, leaving behind a fractured family and a story of neglected responsibility.
At the beginning of this week I(18F) babysat my sister’s (26) two kids (2 and newborn). She is a single mother and went out to meet with friends to have lunch. She promised me to be back after few hours.
I didn’t want to babysit since it would cost me precious ecam prep time and I was anxious because of the newborn and my zero experience but he begged and cried so much I did it.
She didn’t show up until yesterday in the evening, and I wasn’t able to reach her during the four days and called even hospitals if they found a female body or what because I seriously thought something major happened.
Turns out she was partying and lost track of time and I should just stay calm and don’t cause so much drama because everything is good and nothing bad happened to the kids. She didn’t see the fact that I was shaking and had panic attacks.
After she told me to shut the ef up because she tried to sleep I just packed my stuff and now I’m in the train going to my place.
When she left she called me, and said how dare I leave because I promised to take care of the 2 year old when she goes to the hospital for the appointment on Saturday morning. And that I promised that before she partied so no matter what I had to keep my word.
I feel a little guilty but also I’m afraid she will continue like that and I felt I need to protect myself.
My mom and her think I’m the AH. My mum partly understands but said I should have been patient one more day until after the appointment.
Conclusion
The original poster (OP) is facing a significant conflict between their sense of responsibility toward their sister and the urgent need for self-preservation following four days of extreme stress and abandonment. The sister’s actions—failing to return for four days, ignoring contact, and then dismissing the OP’s panic attacks—created a situation where the OP felt trapped by an initial promise while enduring severe emotional distress.
Given the extreme breach of trust and the apparent disregard for the OP’s well-being, is the OP justified in prioritizing their own mental and physical safety by leaving, even if it means breaking a secondary commitment regarding a future medical appointment?
Here’s how people reacted:
I’m in shock.
Yes, moms need to recharge & to get adult outings….but in a responsible way. I didn’t trust hardly anyone w my nursing NB precious baby!
That baby could be crying all night w a stranger. Plus, if you wipe the #2 mess incorrectly they can get infections, etc.
It’s HARD watching a NB & toddler. Your mom can volunteer instead of pressuring you.
You gotta focus on school & your life.
Helping is taking the toddler to a park….not 24/7/4 care for a reckless & uncaring mom.
Newborns are fragile! So lucky there wasn’t a tragedy.
NTA
Again she was gone for a DAYS when she was supposed to be gone for hours? That’s a little mistake for a computer to make but that’s bugfuck insanity for a human.
How did your mother respond when you told her you had her granddaughter and that her other daughter was missing? How did she respond after the the first day she was missing? The second? At what point did you file police reports? What did the police say when your sister turned up?
You’re an asshole for this stupid fake fucking story.
She was missing and unable to be found while that baby could have been in hospital or worse while an 18 yo was responsible for them.
Also why your mom come and take them? Their mother is her daughter so she should be responsible not you. Minute it exceeded 5 hours Grandma should take them.
Your family need to understand that you could have called social services or police (after one day I would have).
Even if she was just partying, for her own safety you should have done it, because you didn’t know where she was.
Don’t accept to be put in this situation again with anyone.
Please concentrate in your exam prep and ignore both of them. Your mother just doesn’t want to do it herself.
Dont watch them again and dont feel bad – if your mother has an issue with it **she** can watch them next time. Nothing stopping your sister taking both kids to the appointment
She abandoned her children, including a NEWBORN for 4 days and was unable to be contacted.
Thats not “losing track of time” – thats straight up neglectful and should be reported.
also what if any of the kids had an emergency during those 4 days and she didn’t answer the phone?
never babysit again for your entitled sister, not your circus, not your monkeys..
At all.
She got you to watch them for a couple hours to go lunching, then decided to just extend that into four days of partying.
And she had the nerve to attack you??
Your mom is also TA for agreeing with her, how on earth does she not see a problem with what she did
You have a life that you need to live. Good luck in school and best of luck.
Your mom should be livid at her for abandoning her children for FOUR DAYS
Updateme
If you babysit for her again expect this to happen.
She’s a mother and needs to be taking care of her children, not partying for days
Report her to child services, and stand your ground. NTA
Obviously NTA. Your sister has serious problems and those kids are in danger!