As somebody who worked in dental for 25 years, running different types of dental practices… I would be gone.

I’m not joking. Leaving your teeth to go like this is inevitably going to lead to health issues at some point. There are correlation between periodontal disease and heart disease.

And I guarantee you that somebody who doesn’t brush their teeth has peroneal disease. I can only imagine what his breath smell smells like. And any hygienist will tell you that the minute he walks in and even starts talking to them, they already know he has periodontal disease.

And don’t mistake, gingivitis for periodontal disease. Periodontal disease will result eventually in his teeth, loosening up and literally falling out of his head. And the easiest way to prevent that is to brush and floss.

Seriously… That’s all it takes. Brushing is not enough. Brushing will not get the food that’s caught in between teeth. That have very tight context. You have to floss.

Did you know that if you have a heart procedure or a heart attack, we can’t even really clean your teeth for a good three months. And that’s because your mouth has bacteria. Strong bacteria.

When we clean your teeth, almost every single person will have a little spot that bleeds here there or something might’ve been caught, etc. But that opens a pathway into your bloodstream for that very strong bacteria from your mouth to travel and make its way to your heart. That is already compromised.

So when your heart doctor does give you the OK to get a dental cleaning again, they are probably going to have you premedicate as a precaution. They’re going to have you take an anabiotic before we clean your teeth just in case that happens. And that way that bacteria can’t take hold at any heart defect area. 

That’s how serious this shit is. So frankly, I’m sitting here going… While you’re looking at a husband, you’re gonna have to be taking care of in a number of years. Brushing your teeth is one of the most basic forms of self-care. And he is unwilling to do that for you. He will do it for other people. But not you.

And then gets mad when you don’t want his nasty ass anywhere near your mouth or any other part of you… Yuck. I cannot tell you how grossed out I am. Because I’ve seen this shit that comes out of people’s mouths who don’t brush their teeth. You can look it up online.

That’s the crap he’s wanting to kiss you with. Wanting to do other things to you with. And if you look up dental hygienist, cleaning tartar off of teeth… I’m betting he’s got some of that buildup around some of his teeth. But if he doesn’t, he has it under the gum around the roots of his teeth.

Because that’s where that buildup starts. It only start showing around your teeth when there’s no more room under the gum. It just keeps building up and building up and building up. And it’s hard. All tartar is hardened mouth bacteria… And probably some food particles, etc.

How’s it going so yeah, this is leaving worthy to me. I don’t want to find myself later in life, taking care of somebody with health issues that were easily prevented or are being exacerbated by his lack of personal hygiene.

You have tried to cover all your basis. Mental health. Dental phobia. Whatever. But you can’t do this for him, and he is showing you again and again that he is unwilling to do even the most basic personal care so that you would want to be around him. And then he wants to try and make you feel guilty because you’re understandably grossed out by his breath and his mouth?

Yeah, I know. I guarantee you that you can smell him coming a mile away. He may think people can can’t? I guarantee you they do.

Just my honest opinion here… if you tell him not brushing his teeth before kissing you after you have made it clear it is very unpleasant for you to have him do so is proof he neither loves nor respects you and as such should not be allowed the PRIVELEDGE of kisses or sex from you or with you at ALL marriage certificate or NOT he is NOT abiding by HIS end of the Marriage vows or Contract and as long as He refuses to do so and show you love respect and concern that as you shared – he shows strangers in public before an appointment brushing his teeth like that for them – but NOT YOU – is Shouting he Very Likely A Narcissist personality disordered Male – as such Abuses from him will only get worse from Here – if You and He Refuse to make significant positive changes and fast! If he refuses to work on being a better husband and human being then YOU will have to do the Brave act of Leaving Filling for Divorce ASAP protecting your credit finances and if any kids them as well and after relocating doing your Healing work thereafter. For Now Set Healthy Boundaries with him and stick to them no matter what!! N

I don’t mean to offend anyone, but I’m not sure this is a real story. Oral health is a huge industry, puts out tons of adds on all kinds of platforms, is widely talked about and criticized, and known to be linked to all kinds of other health issues. I couldn’t fathom knowing someone who didn’t brush at least once a day, let alone putting my face anywhere near theirs for fear of catching whatever awful germs/diseases might be growing in their petri dish face.

If this is true, you ATHA for NOT LEAVING. There’s no way a person is perfect in every other way and this is the ONLY red flag.

Gross nasty people typically get MORE gross and nasty with age. I would actually consider leaving over this because in 10 years you will be writing in that he only showers once a week and comes to bed dirty and stinking up the sheets. It IS your business because he SMELLS BAD. It is your business because there is a DIRECT link between oral health and heart health and you probably don’t want to be responsible for caring for a man with premature heart issues that are preventable.

NTA.

Dude. Ew. No. I have a strong sense if smell. Even if i think i smell something funky on me. I brush. I brush my teeth and tongue and floss. It’s how it should be.

For it to smell that bad when windows are up must be nasty af. Not kissing him makes sense. Therr must be like a whole forest of nasties crawling in there. His own eco system.

I am going overboard but it’s gross.

NTA, but it seems the last conversation where he left it at “it isn’t your CONCERN”, so probably he didn’t understand that you are not just bringing it up for his well being, but also your sanity. Bring it up again and make sure he understands that you are repulsed by his dental hygiene and it is literally affecting your marriage.

NTA. Not brushong you teeth can cause cavities. Cavities are caused by bacteria that can be spread through saliva, meaning they can be transmitted to you through kissing or sharing utensils.

Also I remember how not brushing your teeth can increase the risk of heart problem.

It’s so disrespectful how he doesn’t care for you.

I don’t blame you for wanting to leave. His behavior says that your feelings don’t matter to him at all. He never even considered it. He only cares about himself. Sounds like he really didn’t take the vows seriously.

What he’s doing is disgusting. Tell him to start researching dental bridges and dentures.

I bet what you are smelling is gum disease or trapped food particles in between his teeth. I have a strong sense of smell. I can smell gum disease when people get near me. I can smell if a person hasn’t washed their hair in a few days when I hug them. I even smelled my mom’s endometrial cancer. Gross!

I’m just wondering how this man was able to get married, but there is a whole incel community spending their entire life’s focus on maxxing every perceivable quality in order to get laid once. Your husband does not deserve a wife. You should really divorce him, and tell him its because of his teeth.

NTA, he’s going to have a lot of dental, and medical bills in the future, because it can lead to a whole host of other medical issues. He is at a much greater risk for heart disease now. Ditch the man, and save yourself thousands of dollars in medical bills and the long term care for him.

Yeh honestly justified. Cut off any kissing because it’s not up to you whether he brushes, then it’s not up to him whether you kiss him or embarrass him by rolling down the windows. If you let him see the real consequences instead of being polite then he might change toon or you leave em

I’m going to say NTA on this one. However if his dental hygiene is the only issue here. Just start withholding all forms of intimacy. Not even talking about sex, kissing too. It shouldn’t be that hard for a grown ass man to spend 2 minutes a day taking care of his teeth.

it’s less about him not brushing his teeth- it’s completely about his refusal to acknowledge your struggle with it.

Like if not for his own well-being and hygiene it’s a 2 min task what twice a day? for YOUR SAKE, his wife.

He’s in an inconsiderate AH.

He probably has a plaque wall behind his teeth, almost guarantee it. I would definitely raise some hell about it, how it affects you and how bad it is for him. Show him videos on plaque, that made me want to start brushing twice a day.

No kissing for sure. Not brushing will give him gingervitis, possible heart problems, infections, and his teeth will eventually fall out when his gums recede. Good luck with that.

WNBTA. Hygiene is important. Sexual attraction is important. Being able to talk about your feelings and address issues is important. And he’s checking none of these boxes.

My ex was like this his breath was so bad after we ate it smelled better for a bit. It was just one of the many reasons I finally left but it was a big issue for me.

Does he go to the dentist? Because they should point out how serious that is. They will eventually need to go. Getting fake teeth is very expensive.

NTA.
Brushing one’s teeth twice a day is personal hygiene 101.
What else doesn’t he do? Wash his hands after using the toilet? Wipe his butt?
Yuck!

A male cousin almost died a few years ago because of the infection from his teeth that traveled through his body. Your husband is an AH.

So either he was only brushing his teeth while trying to court you or you were blinded by gingivitis tinted glasses.

Either way NTA

Can we please, collectively as women, stop dating men who literally cannot do the bare minimum to be decent human beings?

2 mins in the morning and 2 mins at night. Your Husband must be EXTREMELY busy to not have time for that.

This sounds like a nightmare I’d leave my partner over something like this! That’s just fucking gross 🤢

May be start with Elmo’s brushy brush song. Its got a good beat and got my toddler to start brushing!

Divorce him. Hygiene is a minimum show of respect if not for him for you stop kissing the man.

But like…does he go to the dentist? Get them to DRAG him. Embarrass the hell out of that man.

He brushes his teeth for his barber but not his wife. This man doesnt respect you at all.

GIRL….

PLEASE don’t tell me you let him put THAT mouth on your vagina.

Please…

Man aside for doing that for anyone, not doing it is disgusting

Dental issues directly affect heart health. He’s a moron.

Probably doesn’t even wash his ass. Throw him away!

It’s your business when he wants to kiss you. NTA.

It will become your financial concern soon enough

Well it’s his teeth that will be fucked soon

You’re still having sex with him?? 🤢

Bet kissing him is beyond gross.