Yet, amidst the shadows of loss and chronic suffering, she finds a fragile spark of hope in the warmth of a puppy’s presence. This small companion is more than a pet; he is a symbol of resilience and acceptance, a silent witness to her strength as she redefines family and embraces the life the universe has shaped for her.
I had to get my uterus removed in 2015 because my endometriosis was beginning to grow and attach to my other organs, and had to get my ovaries removed a year later because they started growing massive painful cysts afterwards.
I’m dealing with menopause at 28 years old, and still deal with a lot of residual lower abdominal pain. This is just my life now. I admit that the chronic pain definitely puts me on edge quite often and I have a lot less patience than I used to have.
I had gotten a puppy mid-summer and he was approved to come to work with me after he was 6 months old (got fixed, training, and his vaccines), so he started bussing on my lap with me.
Lots of people ask to say hi and stuff, I don’t mind. I got him because I decided my life isn’t viable for adopting a child (low wages, no time, and I’m single). I had a rough childhood in poverty and refuse to bring another kid into that.
Pretty much, the universe is telling me that children just aren’t in the cards, and I’ve accepted this.
Anyways, yesterday I was on my way home from work with my puppy sleeping on my lap. A woman sat next to me and started gushing over him, and then started talking to me.
Her: “Puppies are excellent practice for children!”
Me: “That’s nice but I’m not having any.”
Her: “Oh never say never! I used to say that too until I popped out 3 beautiful sons!”
Me: (starting to get really uncomfortable) “Cool, good for you. Not going to work for me.”
Her: “Well you’re still young, you better get started now before you miss your window! The clock is ticking!”
At this point I was near tears from frustration and said “Lady I don’t HAVE a UTERUS, so I think that window had fucking LONG past. Maybe you should put more thought into what you say to strangers before opening your mouth next time.”
She looked at me shocked for a moment before she spit out “Huh, maybe it’s a good thing you can’t get pregnant. You have the attitude of an abusive parent.”
I had had enough and got off at the next stop even though I was several stops away from home, and cried on a bench for a while.
When I got home and started venting to a friend, they said that what she said was obviously horrible, but I shouldn’t have antagonized her and just moved to a different spot when she wouldn’t drop the subject.
Conclusion
The original poster (OP) experienced severe emotional distress when a stranger aggressively pushed unsolicited advice about having children, which directly conflicted with the OP’s irreversible medical reality and deeply held personal decisions regarding parenthood. While the stranger’s comments were deeply offensive and invasive, the OP’s final reaction involved a sharp, confrontational disclosure about their medical history in response to continued pressure.
Was the OP justified in their heated final statement given the extreme provocation and violation of personal boundaries, or would ignoring the stranger and physically leaving the interaction sooner have been the more appropriate action to manage the conflict?
Here’s how people reacted:
She sucks shit for assuming things about a stranger and pressuring her ideals into you. She could’ve dropped it before you got annoyed but she didn’t, I’d say she’s more of an AH than you. She sucks even more shit for continuing to say that it’s a good thing -that’s not true, she just actually sucks.
but why are you inviting an issue?
Look, sometimes life is about going along to get along. This is a stranger you will never see again. Like it or not (AND I WOULD NEVER DO THIS), most people do not see talking about having kids as a private topic.
Maybe they should. But they dont.
Let me be clear: I am not saying YTA. I’m saying for YOUR sake, just dont engage. And if you must engage, just shine them on.
Sure you coulda handled it better or told her that it’s a difficult subject for you, but given the circumstances it’s understandable that you were pushed past your breaking point.
I’m sorry you had to go through that.
“Nah, I’m not the kind of person who tells lies”