NTA…for leaving the weekend when they made it all about you and not actually about the bride.

But, did you have no idea that you were doing all of this for the bride without being asked to be a bridesmaid? and you say this is your best friend? Apparently she does not feel the same. To not only treat you this way, but to let others make a joke about you after all you had done for her?

Who planned the Miami trip?

At this venture, I would be done with Nicole. No more help. No more support of any kind. She gets what she gives. And she is lucky if you even attend this wedding or get her a gift. Or even talk to her any longer.

Ask Nicole exactly how “you” made the weekend all about you? It seems that her friends and she, herself did that. They are the ones that as soon as you arrived, gave you a sash. They are the ones who joked about you all weekend. Calling you names. Gave you the pull out couch. Were you just there for entertainment purposes for them? You would think that since you left early, they would have had a better weekend with the way they treated you. Or was that the sole purpose of their weekend? To belittle you? Was that her idea of a way to celebrate her bachelorette? Put the onus back on her to try and explain. Which she will not be able to.

Please do not go to the wedding, please cut them off entirely, all of them, including Nicole. They conspired in advance to make you the butt of their jokes including acquiring the sash. They planned who would sleep where, and relegated you to the couch. They made it OK to make snarky comments and treat you in micro aggressive ways. They are still talking about you now and badmouthing you now so if you show up to the wedding it will be more of the same. Get your money back on anything you paid for, plan a fabulous weekend getaway for when the wedding is and post glamorous pictures of yourself all over social media so that they can see you are not sitting at home thinking about them. But please please please please please do not go anywhere near that wedding or that group of toxic v****es.

From Nicole’s reaction to lash out rather than to apologize for bitchy behavior, this likely wasn’t the case, but it’s *possible* they had imagined that it’d come across as an acknowledgement of the support you’ve given as someone who isn’t in the wedding party, and their implementation was just shitty.

You were not wrong to walk away and in no way the asshole. You left quietly and didn’t make a scene. I think after you left some of the remaining girls realized they went to far and an argument of some kind started about you leaving. Hence, Nicole claiming you made the weekend all about you when in fact the jokes were foisted onto you without your consent. She was likely looking for someone to blame rather than acknowledging that she caused this problem.

NTA-you thought you had a friendship and were being a good friend, Nicole obviously had a different opinion about your relationship.

Nicole is an asshole for treating you like this. She is even more of an asshole for actually coming up with a plan before hand to treat you like shit. A sash that says Honorary Backup Bridesmaid isn’t something that is easy to come by. If all the other friends are making comments about you being an unpaid assistant that means Nicole has been talking shit about you to them.

You absolutely did the right thing by leaving. You didn’t ruin the weekend. Nicole ruined her own weekend by being an asshole and not appreciating how much of your time and effort you gave her.

Nicole may be your best friend but you are not hers. It sounds like she’s happy to use you, though. The fact that you’ve done so much and that she not only lets her bridesmaids treat you this way but that she actually joins in? And that’s not some side joke….they planned this all out. I mean, it’s not like someone has random sashes lying around.

So now you know what Nicole says behind your back and how little she values your friendship. Time to cut all ties and find people that are more genuine and relationships that are more reciprocal. No need to spend any more time on this wedding. I hope you’re not planning on attending, either.

NTA. You actually left without making it “all about you”. Not being picked as a bridesmaid can be difficult, but IMO it’s usually a blessing. However, it’s one thing to not be chosen and another thing entirely to be mocked. She showed you how she actually feels… and unfortunately it sounds like she was using you and the friendship was one-sided. Make some fun plans for her wedding day and make it “all about you”. (and try to move on and let her toxicity go).

I’m sorry you were treated that way by a so called friend. You were used and mistreated.

I would block Nicole’s number and chalk that up to a lesson learned.

You deserve so much better than the way you were treated. Use the money you planned to spend on bridesmaids attire and a wedding gift and treat yourself to a weekend away on the wedding date.

You will grow from this experience and go on to form healthier relationships. My best to you OP! ❤️

no way this is real bc why would you show up and staying seeing how they treated you after a few hours? AND you’re the only one without a room?

No way I would’ve tolerated that for a few hours let alone an entire weekend. She used you and it was obvious bc no way she asked everyone else and not you on accident. If you have anything for her wedding I wouldn’t give her any of it. Learn to respect yourself.

NTA because if it truly were a joke and in good heart, her reaction would have been very different. Her saying you ruined the weekend is RICH, she sounds like a horrid friend with a big ego. Cut your losses and move on honestly you sound WAY too good of a friend and companion to waste energy on horrible people

So you just realized that not one of these friends care about you? Sorry. Sounds like a huge expensive mistake. And their all mad at you? Because they feel guilty? Why were you the only one without a room? Why did you let them mock you all this time? Is this the first wedding amongst your (ex)friends?

>made it all about me

The sash, the comments, all of it was *them* making it about *you*. The sash had to be ordered several days to a week+ in advance. All of it was planned.

They decided to act like aholes and treat you like trash and you were absolutely right to walk away from it all.

NTA

a bunch of so called “friends” making you the butt of their jokes? Welp, women are now officially acting like the jackasses men always were. You did good, standing up for yourself. You are worth more than this behavior, and you gotta value yourself because these “friends” sure don’t.

Good job!

That wasn’t a joke or a prank.

If you actually talk to her and she tries to claim it was such ask, “What part of that was supposed to funny for me? Why did you feel entitled to make me feel uncomfortable and excluded?”

She isn’t your friend, hon.

She went directly to accuse you of ruining the weekend instead of doing some self reflection, if this breaks the friendship, it doesn’t seem like you will lose that much.

Eternal high school bullies are so annoying.

NTA.

Is she your best friend or are you her best friend? Bc this isn’t how a bestie treats their bestie…something is very one-sided here. Time to re-evaluate who your friends really are because these people sound like TAs.

NTA. NTA. NTA.
Leaving was absolutely the right move.
I hope you blocked everyone.
Please don’t attend the wedding, either.
You owe her/her shitty ass friends nothing.
I’m sorry you were taken advantage of. 🙁

She’s not funny,band neither are any of the “jokes”. You did the right thing. She used you and then treated you cruelly. None of them ate your friends. Move on with your life. Spend your time & money on you!

NTA. She’s not your best friend. At least you finally know where you stand. Stop helping with anything. I’d not attend the wedding honestly and would cut her off if she didn’t publicly apologize.

NTA. A true friend doesn’t publicly humiliate you, especially after you’ve been so supportive. Don’t stay in a situation where you’re being disrespected and made to feel like a joke.

The fact Nicole didn’t defend you when you get bullied by her bridesmaids says a lot about her friendship with you. You think she’s best friend, she think you’re a joke.

NTA. They treated you like crap, you had every right to walk away. If they aren’t happy about how things turned out, they need to take a look at their role.

You were bullied. I think your friendship just ended, and I feel sorrow for you. Find a healthy way to heal, but leave this friend group completely.

I guarantee you there is a group chat with all those harpies talking mad shit about you for months.  NTA. Find new friends that actually like you.

Omg! Another AITAH bridal story. The dramas so high because the stakes are so fucking low. Duh, this isn’t a friend, it’s a “friend”

NTA. The only thing you did wrong was not leaving earlier. These are not friends, they are mean girls. Best to leave them to it.

NTA. That wasn’t a prank. It was bullying. You don’t owe her an apology for refusing to be the punchline.

NTA in my mind. If you didn’t feel welcomed, why stay there just to be the joke of the group.

Mean girls are real. Make new friends. Leave this group, or those who do not respect you.

Nta and i would drop them all. And make it public why. They are toxic as shit.

NTA. I would have left sooner tbh. These girls are not your friends.

I hate it when people take a joke too far and won’t own up to it.

Go to the wedding and hand her a sash that says first wife. NTA

Being treated as “less than” is always a reason to walk away.

Why didn’t you just go along with being a punching bag? NTA

Nta. you deserve better people in your life.

NTA. I would not attend the wedding.

She is NOT your “best friend”.