But hope quickly turned to heartbreak when her mother forbade her from buying a proper cage and supplies, halting her plans cold. What should have been a shared celebration of love and responsibility spiraled into a painful argument, leaving her caught between her passion for her pets and the walls of misunderstanding closing in around her.
I am 17 and a Female my birthday was 2 weeks ago and my mom got me 3 chinchillas. I had been saving up money through my job to buy my own supplies and chinchillas. I was surprised when my mom handed me the animals on my birthday.
I was excited as they are a dream pet of mine. she gave them to me in a really small travel cage sorta thing. (think one of those really shitty hamster cages little kids keep their hamsters in).
With the money, I got for my Birthday including the money I had saved up I had enough to get a multi-level cage and all the supplies and toys I would need and still have around 100 or so dollars left over.
I didn’t want to keep the chinchillas in the small cage they came with for long so after checking over my budget one my time and clearing a space in my room. I told my mom I was heading to the pet store to grab a bigger cage and some supplies.
My mom stopped me dead in my tracks and said I wasn’t allowed to go. this started an argument between us. my mom was going about how she thought chinchillas only live a few months and she didn’t want a huge stinky cage in her house and how I was wasting my money on something that’s probably not going to live that long.
Since chinchillas are like a dream pet for me I’ve done a lot of research about chinchilla care and I kept telling her they live for around 10 years and need lots of room to play. but she kept saying “well in the pet store they said they’d be fine in that cage I got you” or “In the wild, they don’t live that long I’m sure they get eaten anyway”.
It got really frustrating for me since I want to be a responsible owner and care for the animals properly by my mom kept insisting I was being overdramatic. Since I wasn’t allowed to get the stuff I need for the chinchillas I told my mom I was going to rehome them.
she went off and called me dramatic, selfish, ungrateful, and rude.
My dad came home later that day and told me I should apologize to my mom and keep my pets that I was being unreasonable and acting like an asshole towards my mom. I refused to apologize to my mom and got into contact with a friend of mine who I know takes great care of her chinchillas and had an extra cage I offered her the animals and she took them and paid me.
I went home and tried to give the money to my mom to pay her back and she got mad and called me an ass and said I was ungrateful and acting like a terrible daughter.
Conclusion
The original poster (OP) felt strongly committed to being a responsible pet owner, which conflicted directly with her mother’s refusal to allow the necessary steps for proper animal care, including purchasing an appropriate habitat.
The core debate is whether prioritizing the well-being of the animals, based on extensive research, justifies defying a parent’s directive, or if maintaining familial respect and obedience by keeping the pets despite inadequate housing was the expected behavior.
Here’s how people reacted:
Also, a small cage would smell just as bad as a large one, if not worse due to the animals being crammed together.
EDIT: Wow, did NOT expect this to get such a big response. Thanks so much for the awards, but if you’re thinking of adding to them please consider donating to your local animal rescue instead.
But seriously, you put the safety and well being off the defenseless animals first, which was the humane thing to do.
Your mother has no feelings other than pure selfishness. Your father is no better. Someone who abuses animals and who tries to force you to go along with it is a cold hearted monster. And then she tried to guilt trip you for refusing to participate. Don’t feel guilty about her poor little fee-fees being hurt.
Move out as soon as you are old enough.
Edit: if it’s rehomed to a good place that you have contact with then definitely nta in both occasions
Edit 2: NTA
>she went off and called me dramatic, selfish, ungrateful, and rude.
“Ok.”
>my dad came home later that day and told me I should apologize to my mom and keep my pets that I was being unreasonable and acting like an asshole towards my mom.
“I will not torture animals to make my mother happy.”
This reminds me that my boyfriends mom bought a pug thinking they only lived a few years and asked us when he was going to die since he’s already 10
You did what was right for the animals…your mom should never buy pets again if she isn’t going to actually take proper care of them.
ive run in with the fluff balls myself.
Edit to add: no mammal has a three month life expectancy and she bought three of them. Just makes me wonder if she also bought rat poison.
but is there a chance she purposefully bought really old ones for cheap or something and that she knows they’ll die soon and didn’t want you to waste money?