In the quiet moments of early morning, a battle for their daughter’s health unfolds between love and fear, trust and defiance. The father’s desperate attempts to protect his child clash with his wife’s unwavering certainty, revealing a heartbreaking struggle where the innocence of their infant hangs in the balance, and the fragile bonds of family are tested by choices that could shape her future.
My wife and I have a 2 month old daughter. For the past month she’s been feeding our baby mashed potatoes, applesauce, sweet tea, assorted fruit juices and other things.
The last time we went to the doctor, our pediatrician told us to not give her anything but formula until she was between 4-6 months old. My wife does not care and says she knows best for our child and our doctor isn’t the parent.
Our daughter is always constipated and screams for hours at night that my wife says Is
ormal colic. I’ve asked her numerous times to stop feeding her table food and go back to giving her formula.
She is only feeding her one or two bottles of formula while I’m at work.
The other morning she was cooking scrambled eggs and oatmeal and I was off work so I started to make our daughter a bottle and feed her and she stopped me and told me not to fill her up with that and she wanted her to eat her oatmeal first.
I fed her the bottle anyway after a huge argument.
Well baby had a doctors appointment and my wife was talking about the colic and screaming fits and when the doctor asked what she was feeding her she only said ormula
othing else.
I was angry because she lied and told her the pediatrician every single thing that she had been giving her and the doctor strongly recommended her to stop and that she was causing stomach upset and more than likely the reason for all her stomach issues.
Instead of being apologetic for this, my wife is mad at me and told me I
atted
her out to the doctor and that she doesn’t have to listen to her and that it’s only a recommendation and that I made her look like a bad parent.
I tell her what a selfish little twat she was being and now she wants me to go stay with my parents until she forgives me and asks me to come home. AITA here? I maybe I shouldn’t have flew mad at her and said some things I did.
Maybe I should apologize to my wife.
Conclusion
The original poster (OP) is facing a serious conflict stemming from his wife’s decision to feed their two-month-old daughter solid foods and sugary liquids against medical advice, leading to the baby’s physical discomfort and dishonesty during a medical consultation. While the OP acted to protect the infant’s health by telling the doctor the truth, his subsequent angry reaction and verbal insults have escalated the domestic tension, leaving him questioning his own communication style.
Did the OP’s emotional outburst and harsh name-calling justify his wife’s demand that he leave, or was his reaction a necessary defense of his child’s well-being against medically dangerous choices? The core debate remains whether immediate, strong emotional confrontation is acceptable when a child’s health is at risk, versus prioritizing calm communication even when faced with willful disregard for expert medical guidance.
Here’s how people reacted:
But something is going on with your wife. Your doctor is absolutely right your daughter can’t digest the food she is being given. Not only can it cause damage but your daughter is literally screaming in pain from
trying to digest it. I’m not a psychologist but I have had a baby before. The first months postpartum are very hard and sometimes postpartum depression comes out in many ways. Paranoia; thinking everyone is out to get you and your baby, rage at feeling that anyone else knows more than you and other strange thoughts. The fact that your wife is lying to the doctor and knowing your daughters pain and constipation is coming from being fed table food and juice is alarming. I would try and talk to her about why she thinks the food is better for the baby. Does she has something against formula? But I also think she’s needs someone to talk to and sort our her feelings see if postpartum depression is something she’s struggling with and how to help right away.
Edited to say NTA
WATER INCLUDING JUICES CAN KILL BABIES
Listen. I am not trying to alarm you, but baby kidneys are not able to get rid of water the way adults do. Babies should only drink milk or formula because it perfectly balanced for their digestion. Extra water causes kidney damage and can lead to their brains swelling.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m59-OxS7Eso](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m59-OxS7Eso) This video is about how even breast milk, when diluted with water has caused infant death.
You infant doesn’t absorb nutrients from solid food and can starve to death due to being fed things her body cannor absorb. She is ONLY getting 2 bottles of food a day, the rest might as well be styrofoam to a baby.
You child’s mom is not well mentally. Mom does not always know best.
Do what’s right for your child, based on the advice of doctors. Your wife sounds way off base on this one.
NTA.
Edit to add: your wife knows she’s wrong. Saying you “ratted” her out is telling to me. Not sure why she’s putting the health of your child at risk to be the obstinate parent.
Edit: Because this is at the top, OP I urge you to supervise every feeding. Your daughter can choke to death having food, she’s not ready for anything but milk. This is extremely serious.
you should always be honest with your child’s doctor. a baby cannot advocate for themselves and it is your job as a co parent to look out for their best interests. you should absolutely be listening to your doctors otherwise what’s the point of going?
if your wife was confident that the doctors advice was meaningless, she wouldn’t feel the need to lie to her doctor.
Umm last I checked not feeding babies properly is neglect/abuse and if your baby ends up in the hospital sick because of what your wife is doing child protective services will step in and take your baby. Honestly I’d be shocked if your pediatrician didn’t already report you guys to social services.
Please try remove the baby from the situation and also consider help for your wife it does sound like she’s struggling as well
Since you can’t be there all the time, you need to have the baby with someone who will not abuse her with food.
You should go stay at your parents until she forgives you. And take your daughter with you. The girl needs a parent.
YTA for letting this go on so long. Don’t ever put your wife’s ego ahead of your child’s health.
Garbage in garbage out rules apply.