Now, as she steps forward to lead as president, facing fierce competition from seasoned candidates and a wild card named Alex, the weight of her journey presses heavy. This is more than an election; it’s a battle for the future she helped build, against forces that may not understand the sacrifices it took to get here.
I (28f) have been a member of a large volunteer organization for several years. I am one of the longest-standing members, I have spent hundreds of hours on various aspects of it, I’ve held small leadership positions in almost every area, and I have a large amount of experience being the president of another organization as well.
When I first joined, things were not doing well, so I (with others) worked our asses off to improve that, and we did.
In fact, we did so well with improving the atmosphere that we had a massive amount of incoming members, who quickly became very close with each other (something we specifically encouraged) and have absolutely no idea how bad things used to be, or how much behind-the-scenes work it takes to maintain the way things are now.
I ran for president in the most recent election. I ran against five other candidates. Four of us had years of experience and had been preparing our campaign for months/years. One person (let’s call them Alex) was extremely new (a few weeks), had zero experience at all, decided to run at the last minute, and had a very large friend group with other new members.
Alex was barely allowed to run due to how new they were, but made the cut by a handful of days. You can see where this is going.
It was extremely close between me and Alex, and I lost by one vote. The rest of the elected officials were all new members, of the same friend group, also without experience.
Then, it was discovered that 9-10 votes, specifically the votes of other people in leadership positions who worked closely with me, were not counted. This was not intentional or malicious, simply a computer error.
Apparently every single one of them voted for me. I technically won. They tried to get the election results overturned because of it, but higher ups would not allow it, because they feared it would look like favoritism.
At the end of the মুহূর্তে, I was told to keep quiet and not let anyone know about this.
That brings me to my current situation. Because nobody on the new executive team has any experience, I started facing a lot of pressure to take on a lower leadership position solely to guide them and ensure our hard work doesn’t go to hell.
I absolutely refused. In fact, I’ve decided to drop all leadership roles and do absolutely nothing this year. This has lead to multiple people telling me that I don’t truly care about the organization, that I’ll be responsible if it falls apart, etc.
I feel like it’s a slap in the face to expect me to do what a president does without the title to show it.
Am I the asshole for dropping all leadership positions and letting the new team do whatever the hell they want to do?
Conclusion
The original poster (OP) feels deeply undervalued and disrespected after extensive commitment to the organization, culminating in an election loss that was overturned internally due to a technical error, after which they were pressured to perform presidential duties without the title. Their decision to withdraw from all leadership roles is a direct response to this perceived lack of respect and the unfair expectation that they should shoulder the burden of guidance for the inexperienced new team.
Is the OP justified in completely disengaging from all organizational leadership roles as a reaction to being undermined and then unfairly burdened with unofficial presidential responsibilities, or does this withdrawal represent an abandonment of their long-term commitment to the organization’s stability?
Here’s how people reacted:
So let me get this strait. There is a paper trail of the vote not counting all of the votes and yet here we are. You’ve now also been sworn to secrecy. That is not a good look for the organisation and actually reflects extremely poorly on the culture of the organisation. To add to this it appears new members have exclusively voted along friendship lines not for what is best for the organisation. Now that the chaos has begun to descend they are asking you to pick it up and fix it. You are absolutely NTA. You have poured time, resources, skills into the organisation once. They refused to give you the position to continue that stewardship and you don’t feel like working with the current leadership team would be a good fit. That is entirely uncontroversial. Anyone claming you don’t want what is best for the ORG is either very short sighted or acting maliciously in bad faith trying to emotionally twist your arm into clearning up the mess that members have made for themselves.
Honestly, walk away. Sometimes you just don’t win. Be open, honest, non vindicitive, non confrontational, verifiably factual, and walk. Sometimes, in a democratic process, the voters have to learn what it is to make mistakes. This is one such time and if it folds then it is on their heads.
You said in a comment that there is a paper trail. Expose them all and quit. Say you arent going to be treated like this after All that you’ve done. And i dont think it was an error of theyre refusing to change it.
Simply send IT to everyone as a mass email and say you arent going to do the work behind the scenes. You arent going to do the work since they didnt vote fór you they don’t get the benefits ESPECIALLY since they fucked you over like this.
Pls excuse errors and stuff english isnt my first langauge.
You don’t care about the organization, you don’t need to. You care about helping people and volunteering your time and effort. You can do that at a place where you are respected. You don’t need to let go of your self respect to stroke the ego of the very people who made a snafu and refuse to take responsibility and acknowledge their mistake and do the right thing.
Also I think this organisation is going to the dogs anyway, if they have chosen to elect all brand new leadership !
They told you to keep quiet and do nothing because they favored the new guy while saying your win would be of favoritism.
That’s what you should be doing, keep quiet and do nothing.
If Alex and his group can not run the place, they should’ve never been elected in the first place. You should not be cleaning up after inexperienced people because they chose not to elect you.
Besides, you get what you voted for. Maliciously comply until they fix the problem themselves.
Hold them accountable. Let the info out. Then also refuse being involved until those responsible take reasonable action to make sure it doesn’t occur again.
I don’t think Alex should necessarily be the subject of any ire here as they didn’t do anything wrong. But higher ups definitely deserve hell for trying to keep things under wraps.
You should take all the people you like, and go start your own organization. The fact that you really did win and were told to keep quiet about it is beyond rage-inducing. I’m sorry this happened to you.
Tbh if it was me, I would quit even if I lost. But them expecting you to silently do the job anyway with none of the benefits – that’s nuclear revenge territory. Post everything publicly then take everyone who will follow and walk out.
1: If an organisation is going to hire a bunch of total newbies to run it, then that’s not an org you want to be a part of. Members of a few weeks shouldn’t be able to vote, let alone run.
2: They hid votes? Leak everything and leave. It’ll cause a highly deserved shitshow when everyone finds out that you would’ve beaten the fuckwit who only won because of other fuckwits, but they literally handed him the position.
If you quit, make sure people know you are quitting in large part because of their willingness to deceive.
I get it, you actually won. You have proof. Fight for the fact you actually did win. But it seems the “higher ups” don’t want you in that leadership position, or they would be questioning the votes that weren’t counted. I’d be questioning them/that.
They see the good you do and want to keep you on a lower level. So you do all the work and the higher ups don’t have to do shit but flex their “power”.
If they are higher ups they should be just as good or even better at the leadership role than you, based on title not actual ability. So they should do it.
Having said that, if your primary concern is the cause, you should suck it up until the projects you were involved in were done. You don’t owe the organization that, but it would be the best for the cause.
If they “won”, then they need to do the jobs they were “voted” into.
I would show the paper trail that showed YOU were the actual winner, then how they told you to keep quiet about it yet still do presidential work, then tell them that’s why you quit.
find something better to do with your time where you’re valued and not for free (assuming you’re not getting paid bc volunteer)
NTA at all.
And the election counting error just adds salt to the wound.
Why go backwards?
Find a new adventure.