But now, with a new man entering his mother’s life, the boy’s sanctuary is threatened. Forced to choose between loyalty to his father’s legacy and the harsh realities of change, he fights to save the one constant that still holds his family together.
My dad died in a work accident when I was 15 and I’m now 17M. Last year my mom started going out with Anthony and they just got engaged. Anthony wanted to move in but the problem is he’s severely allergic to dogs.
My mom told me we had to get rid of Dax my dog. Like not even as a question just straight up said that’s what we’re gonna do.
I fought with my mom over this because he my family and he’s what’s helped me get through losing my dad. Dax was my dad’s dog that he rescued from a shelter when he was still a puppy and we had him since I was 11.
So he means a lot to me.
But my mom was like nope he has to go.
We fought so much about it I actually cried. Nobody wanted to adopt Dax tho and I had to beg my grandpa from my dad’s side to take him or else my mom was gonna take him to a shelter.
The problem was my gpa lives an hour away and he can’t do much physical stuff like take him out for walks, feed him, take him to vet,etc. And no one around to help him take care of a dog.
My grandpa suggested I could move here with him since all my classes r on zoom and I’m graduating in June anyways. I told my mom I wanna move in with my grandpa so I can be with Dax.
She got really mad about that and she says they (her and Anthony) r my family and I need to be with them. But I told her 1. Anthony’s not my family. I have my own problems with him cause he’s kept talking about being my new dad and I don’t like that shit but he doesn’t listen when I tell him to stop saying he’s my new dad cause he’s not.
And 2. Dax is my family and she made me get rid of him just like that. My grandpa’s my family too anyways.
Last week I got my stuff and my uncle helped me move to my grandpa’s house. My moms still been mad.
She’s not gonna force me to come back but she’s still saying I’m being a really shitty son that I’m choosing to be with my dog instead of with them.
But it hurt too much being without him. He was taken to my grandpa’s a week b4 I left and all that time I was up crying missing him. And I kno he missed me too because he lost it when I got there.
My mom keeps telling me to come back and stop being cruel with her but I’m happy here with my dog. I get she’s got someone new to be happy with and that’s cool it’s her life. But why can’t I be happy too with my dog living with me?
Does it make me an asshole that I basically did choose Dax over her?
Conclusion
The 17-year-old son found himself in a painful situation where his mother prioritized her fiancé’s comfort, specifically his severe dog allergy, over the son’s deep emotional attachment to his dog, Dax, which was a link to his deceased father. The central conflict revolves around the perceived replacement of the biological father figure and the immediate ultimatum to remove the dog versus the son’s need for emotional stability and continuity represented by Dax.
Given the irreversible move to his grandfather’s home to stay with his dog, the core question remains: Is the son acting as a cruel or selfish individual by choosing to prioritize the relationship with his dog and maintaining a stable living arrangement over immediate reconciliation with his mother and her fiancé, or is this choice a necessary act of self-preservation following a significant loss?
Here’s how people reacted:
That said I would advise against making this into a huge rift between yourself and your mom. Mom will be around long after the dog. There is nothing wrong with staying with gramps to be with the dog if that is an option but don’t make it about Mom. Better to try to explain to her you love her but you also feel that connection to your dad with the dog and how much it would hurt to let that connection go.
Making it a choice between her and the dog is not a true reflection of the situation and framing it that way is only going to make for bad feelings.
There is nothing wrong with the choice you made until or unless you choose to let it be wrong. Tell her you love her , I assume you do, tell her how much losing that dog would be like losing your dad over again. Go see her and tell her that when the dog can come back so can you. Till then visit when you can.
Your mom is the AH in this one and so is Anthony, really. Your dog helped get you through some really, really terrible times and he’s a dog, not a stuffed animal, he’s a living thing that deserves a safe home as well.
I think it’s fantastic you get to live with your Grandpa who was willing to take you both in. I think it will be a nice environment for you and Dax and you get some good quality time with him. You weren’t in the wrong at all.
NTA.
Your living situation seems quite toxic right now with your Mom and Anthony, you should try to see if you can stay with your gpa for a few weeks and play it out from there. Also, your dog is way more important to you than Anthony, clearly, so find a way to get to your grandpas.
At the end of the day, Anthony is just some fuckin guy. He isnt your dad if you don’t want him to be your dad. He can’t declare himself your dad. And your mom can’t and shouldn’t force you to live with some fucking guy. Her actions are severely disrespectful, it’s not wrong of you to want to get away from her. And preserving your father’s memory (with the dog) is an important thing to do.
Furry friend was kicked out of the house and you followed him.
NTA. Your stepdad and mom are majorly out of line, and tbh i’m pretty concerned here that your stepdad is going to turn out to be abusive.
Expecting you to give up your father’s dog for a man who is literally a stranger to you is unbelievably cruel. Excepting you to accept a total stranger as your new father is equally unfeeling.
I’m glad you have a grandfather and uncle who could save your dog for you.
NTA
I would ride and die for my dogs no questions asked, even put my dog ahead of my significant others.