In that cruel instant, his world crumbled, not from a grand affair but from a fleeting, drunken mistake that spoke volumes. She wept, confessing her regret, but the damage was done. Love alone could not mend the fracture between them, and he faced the heartbreaking truth that sometimes, even the purest love is not enough to survive betrayal.
I (28m) been married to my wife (29f) for 2 years, dated her for 4 years I won’t lie I still love her and still do and it still hurts me a bit to let her go but I have no other choice but to divorce her cause she betrayed me.
I found out that my wife cheated on me, she didn’t actually cheat, she was just kissing someone while dancing with him, tbh I never suspected her and there were no red flags either, even when I checked her phone.
Until one of her friends I barely know showed me a photo, I asked her multiple questions like if she sleeps around or repeatedly kisses someone else etc but she said this never happened before and she was very drunk but she thought I should know, I thanked her and told her to forward that photo to me.
I immediately asked my wife if she ever cheated, she refused so I showed her the photo, my wife started crying and said it was a mistake and the only mistake she has made and she didn’t tell me because she thought I would get angry.
I said ofc, wouldn’t you? I said I am divorcing her, she was shocked and said she anticipated that I would get angry but would I divorce and throw away a relationship of 6 years over a kiss?
I said I would and started leaving she tried to stop me but I didn’t listen.
She and our families both called me alot and sent me angry texts, I ignored them all and instead got drunk and started going to clubs.
When I had enough of this harassment I sent a long text to everyone explaining everything and sent the photo, my wife sent me an angry text after I ignored her calls and she said that I shouldn’t have told everyone about what’s happening in our life and her family members are angry at her some even cut her off.
I should have kept it between us both and I going too far over a kiss when she was drunken so much that she could barely walk, so am I the asshole for telling everyone that she cheated?
Conclusion
The original poster (OP) is grappling with a severe breach of trust following discovering his wife kissing another person, leading him to initiate divorce proceedings despite still having feelings for her. His action of publicly exposing the incident against his wife’s plea for privacy highlights a conflict between his need for justification/retribution and his wife’s desire to contain the fallout and preserve their relationship.
Considering the six-year history, the act being a single drunken kiss, and the immediate divorce filing versus the public shaming, is the OP justified in immediately ending the marriage and broadcasting the private betrayal, or did his reaction constitute an overreach that violated the implied privacy required for conflict resolution?
Here’s how people reacted:
His family knew what he was/is.
But after I left with our 3 kids (he wasn’t at home), plus clothes + a kettle.
His mother blamed me for the split.
Even though beforehand she said I had married the wrong brother
So don’t feel bad.
Do what YOU think is right, lovely.
Being cheated on and telling people is your perogative, and I completely understand.
YOU are NTA 💯🫶🥰🏴🇬🇧
You are Not the AH
All you did was set the record straight
And for the record, she did more than kiss this dude
There is a reason her friend reached out and told you the truth. She was disgusted by your wife’s behavior and was trying to help you out
You are making the right choice
Once a cheater, always a cheater
NTAH
I personally witnessed one crazy valentines day party ppl got extremely drunk , it’s hard to explain what the ambience, dance and silly games did to people.. but ppl did things, even those who I know them personally would never act like that with others..
One guy not directly known to me, like friends friend, proposed to my wife and that’s it we ran off!
Too drunk to walk, but not too drunk to dance and make out? She may well have done this before in different company. Your actions have been entirely fair.
Kissing is still.cheating. what did she get so drunk she couldn’t tell that it wasn’t you she was kissing sure ok. A drunk man’s actions are a sober man’s thoughts. And if her family is now angry at her. Not your problem. You were just defending yourself over them bashing you.
There must be more to this
I had a cheating wife and kept it to myself. But I used the fact in the divorce to get what I wanted THREATENING to tell.
Long game buddy.