NTA, you don’t owe her a living anymore, and your son wants to live with you. Just because her boyfriend is medically retired as a fireman, does not mean he can’t work at all, nor her either. She is pregnant, not dying. She may have to work opposite shifts from said boyfriend until her baby arrives so that an adult is present in the home always, but if your son is going to live with you, then that is all on her. Sounds like she wants only partial responsibility for being an adult. Your son should have interviews coming up to see which parent is more suited for him to live with, in many states this is how it is decided. Should be interviews for both you and his mother too, but then again, your state may not handle custody in this way. Is she fighting to retain custody? You didn’t say above.

NTA.

This woman got your marital home, alimony and child support. Then she took in her nephew. Then she took in her boyfriend and his child and made YOUR SON, the only child you should have been paying for, share a bedroom.

On what planet is it reasonable for her to expect you to pay for her, her nephew, her boyfriend, his child and their upcoming baby?

She has had a good run. You have paid for her and her nephew for 5 years. You paid for her boyfriend and his kid for 4 months that you know of.

Being medically retired from the fire service means that he has a good pension. It also means that he can’t work for the fire service anymore, it doesn’t mean that he can’t work elsewhere.

NTA.

In my opinion alimony is a transitional type of payment to adjust to being single and the loss of a former spouses support and income. Obviously she’s adjusted to it by finding another partner and getting pregnant by them.

While it is the best move to allow the girl to have a bedroom of her own, it is not fair to do so at the expense of her own child and further disrupt his life by bringing in an additional child (the nephew) and getting pregnant. Your son should not have to grin and bear all these changes and I don’t blame him for wanting out.

NTA

There is a big difference between child support and alimony (spousal support). The alimony is to help keep your spouse in the lifestyle they were used to, but is typically not forever. Now that she’s with a new guy, it shouldn’t be your responsibility to pay for her lifestyle any longer. It’s not your problem that he doesn’t/can’t work.

Best wishes for success in the custody changes!

Alimony is at the discretion of the court. Of course when someone is paying alimony they are going to argue to the court to reduce their payments, that’s just a no brainer. So your wife shouldn’t be mad at you for doing what any reasonable person would have expected you to, she should be mad at the judge for using their discretion to grant your request.

NTA. Your ex should have been aware of the consequences before letting her BF move in.
You should ask your lawyer if you are entitled to back pay for the alimony you paid that you should not have after the BF moved in. If so, tell your ex that if she fights the loss of alimony, you will push for getting paid back the money you should not have paid.

NTA your son is likely old enough to talk to the judge himself. More than likely his mother will try to tell him what to say, you tell him to say what is the truth and what he wants. Let him know the judge will likely ask him why he wants to live with you and that it is his right to say how he feels and what he wants. Don’t feed him what to say.

Alimony is absolutely not your problem. She has had plenty of time to get a job and she was able to chose a partner who has financial problems. How in any way is that your fault?? She is the AH for even expecting you to continue paying for her life without you in it. Hopefully you can get full custody of your son as well.

NTA. She is in a 2 parent household now. Time to put her easy money to an end (especially when you get custody). You are NOT responsible for financing her BFs kids and them shacking up. Or your former nephew. Let her and her man pay their own bills – your son being taken care of is your only concern.

So ex and her bf thought they were going to be able to live high on the cash cow off your child support and alimony payments? Funny that two people who can’t support themselves, have decided to have another child, I’m sure that’s going to make things easier.

NTA. It’s extremely rare for alimony to last forever and she shouldn’t really ‘double dip’ by getting payments from you while he’s contributing to the household. Probably was avoiding remarriage so that she could keep riding the gravy train.

I doubt you’ll get full custody just because your kid has to share a room. You’re probably looking at 50/50 split and if you make close to the same amount there will be no child support. NTA though for not paying what you don’t have to.

Sounds like your alimony was paying for a whole house full of people! Get custody of your son if you both want it. Then you don’t have to pay child support either, highly likely that money is NOT going to just your son. NTA

Not your problem anymore. Courts cleared you and once you have custody, child support can end too. She should be grateful if she doesn’t have to pay you child support when you win.

NTA, you probably should have done the custody fight first though, then end the alimony cause now she’ll fight you on custody harder to stop herself from losing that money too.

NTA if your son wants to live with you, he should be allowed too. He’s twelve not a baby and should be able to choose.

Your ex’s financial problems are not your problem.

NTA: in this day and age, alimony shouldn’t even exist. Woman are fully able to have careers during marriage if they choose, or resume careers after taking a break.

NTAH

It is not your responsibility to support your ex and her sisters kid and her unemployed boyfriend and his kids

You are ONLY responsible for your son. 

NTA. She is no longer your spouse and doesn’t get a portion of your income for the rest of your lives. She can get a full time job if money is tight.

NTA. She can work full time. They abused you for far too long with alimony.

They shouldn’t have gotten pregnant if they’re struggling financially.

So you’re supposed to support an entire family not related to you? No NTA.

She’s an asshole for even thinking about being mad.

NTA. You’re protecting your kid and yourself. Your ex can piss off if she thinks she’s entitled to you supporting her lifestyle.

NTA….she moved on with another man so she shouldn’t be expecting you to support them. Your only obligation is to your kid now.

NTA

Alimony should not be a thing anyway.

If you are able to get full custody, SHE should be paying child support to YOU.

You are responsible for your son, not your ex, nor her other dependents.
You’re doing the right thing.

NTA… guess she needs a full time job. I hope you get your son and she has to pay child support to you.

Are you an asshole for not giving free money to people who have ZERO right over it? Like what?

Not at all. Take care of your child. You are not responsible for her lifestyle

She can get a full time job. Now it is her new boyfriend to take care of her.

Nta she has a partner and you are no longer financially responsible for her.

NTA.

I hope your son ends up in the best possible living situation.

NTA no way you should be supporting your ex *AND her new family*!!!

NTA and absolutely file for child support once you have custody.

He should apply for child support if his son moves in with him

Why are they having more children if they can’t afford them?

Alimony is bullshit 80% of the time anyways. Fuck her

I hope you got child support terminated as well.

So you are just doing this to piss her off?