AITA for sabotaging my little brother’s food on purpose?

The weight of unspoken expectations crushes her spirit as she returns home, hoping for warmth and rest during the holidays. Instead, she becomes invisible, a servant to her family’s demands, trapped in a cycle where her efforts are expected but never appreciated. Every chore she does is met with entitlement from her younger brother, whose selfishness is shielded by their parents’ blind favoritism.

Her patience frays with each unfair request, each manipulation disguised as a simple favor. The frustration builds silently, a storm of resentment and exhaustion, as she realizes that the love she sought is overshadowed by the burden of responsibility thrust unfairly upon her shoulders.

AITA for sabotaging my little brother's food on purpose?

My little brother is 18. I’m 20. I am staying with my family for the holidays and thought it’d be a nice time but I forgot that they treat me like a housekeeper. I do almost all the chores and I don’t mind if its MY chore.

Obviously, if I notice the dishwashers full, I empty it. If I cook, I clean up. If I make a mess, I clean up. However, if my little brother makes a mess. He makes me clean up. If I refuse and tell him to do it himself, he tells my parents and they side with him and just bug me until I do it.

My brother also asks me to cook for him. He pulls out brownie mix and is like “make this.” I always am like: “Sure, I can make it but you have to help.” He gets mad and says “I helped by taking out the box!” And when I refused to make stuff for him or tell him to make it himself, he’ll throw a fit and tell our parents.

Lately, he keeps asking me to make stuff and I get frustrated going back and forth about why can’t he make shit himself or just ask our parents. So I make the food he asks, but I always add stuff he doesn’t like.

(coincidentally, he hates a ton of stuff I love to eat ) So if he asks for brownies and refuses to help, I put nuts in it. He hates them and I like them. He came over to see the brownies and got mad at me and told me he hated nuts and can’t eat the brownies anymore.

I just said, “too bad, make it yourself next time or help me and tell me not to put nuts in.” I thought he’d learn his lesson to at least help but he keeps asking for stuff and I just keep putting stuff in that he doesn’t like.

He finally got fed up and said he’s not eating because I keep making stuff with stuff he doesn’t like. I just shrugged and told him to make his own food then. He told my parents of course and they just told me to stop being an asshole and make food for him.

It was my last day at home so I just told them to make food for him if they’re so concerned before I left. Now my parents are upset with me and my brother is angry with me and I am wondering if I was too petty

Here’s how people reacted:

Doris_Useless

It sounds like your parents have really different standards for the two of you and much higher expectations on you – I’m guessing this is gender-based, though you didn’t mention. Anyway I think this is hilarious, and you should consider putting it in r/maliciouscompliance. Your brother is legally an adult and certainly old enough to handle making a box of brownie mix, and he’s way past the point where he can stand to learn that if he wants something done a certain way, he can do it himself. NTA and well played.

TogarSucks

NTA.

Reading the title I was thinking otherwise, because you just don’t fuck with someone’s food, but you are not the asshole at all.

Your brother is an entitled little brat who should be more than capable of making food for himself at his age. You know what’s in the food and so does he, he just chooses not to eat it.

Honestly you should make it a rule with your parents going forward that you will not coming to their house anymore unless they make it clear you will not be expected to cook for your brother.

Jackniferuby

NTA and sounds like your parents are enabling your brother. Don’t come over again until they agree to stop coddling him and know that he in no way is YOUR grown son, he’s theirs . If they want to make food for him, they can. If he makes a mess – it’s their responsibility to clean it if he won’t.

Edited to add: you are encouraging it by complying. Just say NO. If your parents nag you about it- say he’s not your kid . Stick to your guns – what will they do? Kick you out? You don’t live there.

AbbyFeedsCats

YTA – You think it’s cute that he can’t do anything for himself and halfheartedly are trying to get him to improve himself. You enjoy watching him flounder and purposefully go out of your way to make stuff just to spite him, instead of maturely addressing the issue. Stop enabling your brother’s bad behavior, you’re 20 years old. He’s an adult. You’re an adult. Act like one. “No” is a full sentence.

idiggory

You need to have a serious talk with your parents about this situation… The inequity here is absolutely ridiculous.

Your brother is an adult, and you are not a servant. Frankly, I’d start looking for other places to spend your time during what I assume are breaks. NTA

EmeraldWeapon56

ESH. You sabotaged his food on purpose which objectively makes you the asshole since you did it out of spite. However your whole family seems to suck. I don’t know why an 18 year old cant be bothered to make box brownies and why your parents seem to baby your brother.

mm172

ESH. If you don’t want to keep making him stuff, then don’t keep making him stuff. Don’t make it for him wrong and then act surprised that he can’t muster up the energy to do more than complain about it when he wasn’t willing to do it himself in the first place.

undergroundmakeup

NTA. He is not a child. He is a legal adult. You aren’t doing this just to be petty, you’re doing it to stop him (and your parents) from taking advantage of you and forcing you to act as his personal chef/maid.

WebbieVanderquack

ESH. It’s never okay to feed someone something they don’t know they’re eating.

> He pulls out brownie mix and is like “make this.” I always am like: “Sure…”

Why? It would be much better to simply say no.

magenta6

NTA as long as no allergens are involved then go ahead and be petty. Little brother is old enough to make his own and your parents need to stop babying him. What’s going to happen if he ever lives alone?

rekniht01

INFO: Are you a female? Sounds like some seriously anachronistic sexism if so.

INFO#2: Is you adult brother autistic? If not, your parents did a shit job raising him.

JaneEyreosmith

INFO: Why on earth are you doing what he says? I get he’s annoying but why should he change when his annoying behavior gets him what he wants?

thundersass

ESH. Y’all are acting like pre-teens, goodness. Just say no to making food if you don’t want to, why are you playing games?

LOL, this sub.

Santigold23

NTA, when I was reading I thought your brother was like 5 then I went back and realized he was **18**!???? Thank God you’re out of there

Slumdunder

Are you sure you’re really 20 years old.

ESH. You both still act like children. Stop letting your little brother boss you around.

Conclusion

The original poster (OP) reached a point of deep frustration due to being treated as a live-in housekeeper by their younger brother, with parental support reinforcing this unfair dynamic. The OP’s actions—intentionally adding disliked ingredients to food—were a direct, albeit passive-aggressive, response to feeling controlled and unappreciated, leading to a significant escalation of the family conflict upon departure.

Was the OP’s method of retaliation through sabotage petty, or was it a necessary, albeit flawed, stand against established and unfair household power imbalances enforced by the parents? The central question remains whether enforcing personal boundaries through spiteful action is ever justifiable when direct communication has failed.