Through the long hours from dawn to nightfall, he captured moments meant to be cherished, all while feeling overshadowed and unappreciated. The weight of expectations and the sting of disrespect left him questioning the true cost of family loyalty.
I (17M) agreed to take wedding photos for my cousin Sarah’s (26F) wedding. She wanted me to take photos of her getting ready, our grandmother putting a family heirloom necklace on her, the first look, the wedding, the reception, etc.
There was also another photographer (a friend of the groom) who was taking photos of the groom and his side getting ready, and he was also taking photos at the wedding/reception. Since I wasn’t a professional photographer by any means I told her I would only charge $50 for the entire day.
And when I say entire day, I mean it. From 8am until 10pm I was with her taking photos and basically being harassed by her, her bridesmaids and my aunt. She was a full on bridezilla the entire time, not just to me but basically everyone including her husband.
It was a long day to say the least.
So after all of that I went home, edited the photos, and copied them onto individual USB drives for people she might want to give them to. I texted Sarah a couple of days later to let her know they were ready and that I would happily meet up with her to exchange them for the $50.
She never responded. For the next three weeks I texted, called, got in touch with her mother (my aunt), and even stopped by her house to try and get the photos to her. She evaded every single attempt.
6 months passed since the wedding and I was at the movies with my other cousin (19M), who was Sarah’s younger bother, and a couple of our friends. He tells me, “By the way, Sarah was wondering when you were going to give her the photos.
She said she would pay you the $10 if that’s the only reason you’re talking so long.” I was livid. First, it was $50. Second, that was the deal from the start! I told my cousin this and said to tell Sarah if she wanted them she needed to contact me within 2 days so we could meet up, with the payment, or I was going to delete them.
This might come as a shock considering the title of this, but she never contacted me. The 2 days passed, I deleted the photos and erased the USB drives. Less than a week went by before my aunt called me in a fit because I “threatened” my cousin into paying me when she “didn’t have the money”.
I told my aunt that she has had a little over 6 months to pull together $50 (which she knew was the agreed upon amount), that she refused to respond to me no matter what I tried, and that it was too late now because the photos were gone.
My aunt, uncle and a few other relatives have been refusing to talk to me or my parents because I deleted, “precious photos that can never be taken again, all because of greed” (literal quote).
My mom thinks I should apologize and am just being stubborn. However, my older brother thinks I held onto the photos longer than I should have, that I should have deleted them after the first week of trying to get into contact with her and being dodged/ignored.
Conclusion
The original poster (OP) completed extensive, demanding work for a minimal fee, only to face evasion and a later attempt by the cousin to devalue the agreed-upon payment. The central conflict arises from the OP enforcing a boundary regarding payment for services rendered versus the cousin’s and other relatives’ expectation that the OP should provide the completed product without consequence for non-payment or contact.
Was the OP justified in deleting the wedding photographs after six months of failed attempts to secure the agreed-upon $50 payment, or did the sentimental value of the images necessitate further patience and compromise, even when facing harassment from family members?
Here’s how people reacted:
Deleting the photo is harsh. I would have kept a USB key. Indeed these pictures cannot be taken again.
I wouldn’t have given her the photos and told her the price had gone up from having to hold onto them for so long and add a $10 fee for each month.
I also think it was a mistake to delete them because you worked that day and now you have lost your only bargaining chip to get some money in exchange for your time and energy spent on that.
Also your cousin is clearly an AH and deserved that. I paid my photographer the day of my wedding. The only thing I paid later was agreed upon and I paid when it was planned.
Hard NTA and next time get paid upfront!
Any reputable wedding photographer has a policy on this. You held family to business standards, nothing wrong with that.
Your mum’s trying to keep the peace. That’s not going to happen. I’d love to know if the groom photographer got paid.
$50 FOR THE WHOLE DAY??? And she still tried wearing you down for half a year? You held on more than necessary, those photos can’t mean that much to her if she isn’t willing to put in the agreed payment.
And judging by your family’s reaction, I can see why Sarah has such an entitled attitude.
Six months to give you just 50 bucks? Sarah had absolutely no plans on paying you.
You had them in a USB, could’ve just thrown one in a drawer somewhere and forgot about it till she actually brought you the money.
your mom is right tho “precious photos than can never be taken again, all because of greed” yeah greed of the bridezilla!!