ESH, she should have told you. Maybe she’s on antivirals and doesn’t have a flare up making transmission unlikely (but not impossible), but still she should have told you.

But man, you fucking spread her incredibly personal business to everyone in your university, and you didn’t even have the balls to do it with your own profile. You’re definitely an asshole. You may have very well have caused serious damage to her social standing and mental health. I can only hope that she can handle the hate she’s doing to get and doesn’t do anything stupid to harm herself.

What concerns me most about this is based on your story your first response was exposing her and getting revenge not getting yourself tested like what the hell. ESH, people spend too much time thinking theyre the heros of their own story just trying to get justice instead of just taking care of their shit. The world doesnt need you to best her the world needs to make sure if you got it or not and if you have it, to make sure you never do what she did. where you are this must not be agaisnt the law so pubically shaming someone is a shitty thing to do.

NTA – everyone who might think it sucks is also simultaneously grateful they benefit from knowing. Oh this person has a contagious infection atm, let me avoid for a while. Oh this road has had an accident, let me find another route. Oh this person has a STD, glad I know. Oh this person has an ex that will break into your home of you date them, glad I know. It’s responsibility to disclose this and arguably once she’s passed it to someone else, it’s out of her hands
– she has no say on who that person shares this info with.

NTA – and she is by the way. Transmitting an incurable disease without warning someone you are infected is a terrible thing to do. Good on you for spreading the word. She may be giving you grief, but think about the guys she \~hasn’t\~ infected with her STD, because you warned them.

Also, while I know you’re young, don’t have sex with people without a recent STD test that shows they are clean. You should have one as well to show them. It isn’t romantic, or sexy, or fun, but it’s better than a life long regret.

OMG YTA in so many ways. like seriously go learn about herpes. the chances of you getting herpes from her when she’s not having an outbreak is next to 0. something like 30% of the population has herpes that stays asymptomatic and they never have an outbreak. there’s a reason clinics don’t test for herpes with out a request for it. It because we all have it (well, at least 30% do) and most of us never have a single symptom.

ESH

She’s an asshole for not telling you. But at the end of the day, everyone is responsible for their own sexual health. If you sleep with a stranger, you take a risk. It’s not right for you to divulge EXTREMELY personal information about someone. The people who sleep with her have their own responsibility and take their own risks. It’s up to them to protect themselves, you don’t need to assume that responsibility.

ESH yes she should have told you but come on. How is this not screaming obvious in your head that disclosing something like that to EVERYONE isn’t ok? She’s not going to sleep with everyone and everyone isn’t going to sleep with her. My god man, that’s sensitive personal info. You are an asshole because doing something in revenge is an asshole thing to do. Two wrongs do not make a right.

ESH OMFG ESH. Yes she should disclose, but YOU my god, you have no right to humiliate her like that. People with herpes face huge amounts of discriminiation for what is essentially an irritating skin disorder. She sucks for not disclosing but I can understand her. You on the other hand, have smeared her name all over the university for revenge. You are a piece of shit.

NTA

If she decides she wants to have casual sex, it’s fine, but she needs to disclose any STIs to ANYONE she intends to sleep with. What she did to you may actually be a crime where you live. If I were you, I’d reach out to your university counseling for information and I’d get tested yourself. Even if she doesn’t have symptoms she could still have passed it to you.

Did you ask her for STI status before having sex? She should have disclosed, but you also should have not assumed otherwise. You both dropped the ball, but you’re revenge posting her status. YTA.

Also, I suggest educating yourself more on STIs, and what actual risks are (these can change greatly depending on medication, etc, others or even yourself may be on.

ESH, In the UK she has legal obligation to disclose her STI status, so she fucking sucks for not telling you that she has a STI. But you going anonymous and posting on Facebook pages its also pretty shitty. You should just have taken it as a lesson in life and moved on. Outing her to everyone at you uni is a shit thing to do.

ESH – She should’ve told you but you shouldn’t have announced it to literally everyone on the university’s Facebook page. But also she shouldn’t have organized a slut shaming campaign against you, as that was obviously not your intention. Also, as a side note, herpes has a much worse stigma than it deserves.

You shouldn’t have blasted it on a Facebook group. I guess she could have told you. Herpes are weird, I get cold sores which is a form of herpes but I don’t tell people I kiss if I don’t have one or feel one coming on. When you have an outbreak you know and then you take the appropriate steps.

NTA, fuck people like her (not literally though, you don’t want that STI).

She’s saying you’re “slut shaming” well if she’s having sex with people and potentially infecting them then she could use a little shaming.

ESH (leaning towards you being the worst) :

Her for none disclosure, and going to a toga party.

You: For harassment, anonymous none the less, and going to a toga party.

NTA Its very messed up that she didnt tell you about her having herpes and you probably saved a few people from getting it

ESH, she has a responsibility to disclose to any sexual partners, and you had no right to broadcast it to the world.