She became aware that one of the boys was standing very close to her and heard a shutter sound, realizing he had taken a picture of her. When she took his arm to demand the photo be deleted, the boy laughed and told her to relax, leading his friends to shout accusations of assault. Now, the user is left questioning her actions after receiving conflicting advice from her husband and sister.
I’m 28F and last weekend I went to a public beach with my husband, 30M with our two children. While setting up our picnic area, I could notice how close some teenage boys standing nearby that were playing loudly and messing around with their phones.
I did not think much of it until I felt the presence of one of them standing very close to me.
I heard a shutter sound as the boy straightened his arm to take my picture, pointing the phone straight at me. I instinctively reached out and snatched his arm, telling him to delete the photo.
He started laughing and told me to “chill out.” My husband came over to back me up at this point, but the other boys by then had begun shouting that I was “assaulting” their friend.
A lifeguard finally came and intervened. I explained to them what had happened. The kid was asked to delete the photo, which he reluctantly did, but his parents who arrived at that moment were furious with me.
They said that I had no right to grab his son’s arm and that he was “just kidding.”
My husband says I did the right thing, but my sister said when she heard what happened that I shouldn’t have touched the boy and that I overreacted. Now I’m wondering whether I made a mistake for that.
AITA?
Conclusion
The original poster (OP) is currently in a state of conflict between defending her personal space and privacy, which led to a physical interaction with a minor, and the judgment from others suggesting she overreacted. Her primary concern centers on whether grabbing the boy’s arm was an overstep that invalidated her right to privacy.
The core debate is whether protecting oneself immediately from non-consensual photography justifies physical contact with a minor in public, or if the reaction was disproportionate to the initial offense. Readers must weigh the right to privacy against the acceptable limits of physical response.
Here’s how people reacted:
If YOU then do what you did by your admission which is take the phone or slap it away or anything similar where you make physical contact with the other person then you have committed an assault by way of unwanted touch upon a person.
I know it all sounds silly and intrusive, BUT it is the law under the 1st Amendment and freedom of the press. If you are in what’s considered a public area, then anyone has a right to record within that space, and if you choose to try to interfere, they can they still maintain that right and can even defend it
So you not only can not try to swipe at their phone or them but they can also defend their right by putting you on your ass and anyone else defending you snd in the end the police would find them without fault and cite everyone attacking them.
Just something to keep in mind when you’re out in public; everyone is filming, and you don’t get to choose when or what they do with it.
Lots of people are saying differently because he’s a minor etc. Just because you said he’s a teenager they are assuming he was under 18. The fact that his parents eventually turned up after the lifeguard did suggests the same thing.
The fact that they had a problem with you grabbing his arm rather than having a problem with their son getting so close to you to take a picture is my biggest concern. There was only one reason he would do that and it wasn’t so that he could search for your swimsuit to buy one for himself.
His parents should be speaking to him about sexualising complete strangers and taking their picture without permission. Instead they told him that he can do whatever he wants because he’s a minor and there are no repercussions.
He’s going to continue with this behaviour and when he hits 18 and is taking pictures of 15 year olds, one of them will have a parent nearby and he will hopefully see that his actions have consequences.
They shouldn’t have done what they did. You probably shouldn’t grab a teens arm. But I fully understand why you did, and don’t know if I wouldn’t do the same.
The parents are correct that legally you cannot grab their arm without their consent.
Generally speaking it’s typically legal to take photos of someone in a public place without their consent. It might be creepy, it might be upsetting, but typically it’s legal. Legality really only comes to play if they’re attempting to publish the photo (or if the photo was taken somewhere with an expectation of privacy, like a bathroom).
NTA.
A teen is perfectly capable of doing much much worse and you’re lucky you were quick and strong and fierce enough to stop them from doing that to you and they should listen. Your sister underestimates the damage that stalking someone can do
Did you see the photo? I’m guessing it was an up close shot of a body part?
If that kid fucked with the wrong person, he would have been left not able to speak.
Either way, predators deserve to be fucked up even if it’s illegal. This isn’t “is this legal” this is, am I the asshole.
Standing up for yourself the way you did does not make you an asshole
I am of course speaking legally, personally I would want you to… never mind . Peace and goodwill and all that jolly stuff. Smile and stay out of jail.
They also could have pressed assault charges on you for that.
Celebrities go through the invasion of privacy on a daily basis.
Kids and parents suck for obvious reasons.
If not, you’ve just admitted to committing assault against a minor, depending if you’re in America or not.
In future, accuse them of being a perv and let the police deal with it. They may find other things in his phone.
Tell the parents to stop raising future sexual deviants
Out in public there is no exception of privacy.
You should be charged with battery on a minor.
At least. Assault.
You should have said “Oh, well, I was also just kidding so we’re even anyhow.”