A man shared his family’s story on Reddit, seeking validation from others on whether or not he did the right thing. He and his sister had no contact with their mother until she showed up unexpectedly at their house one day.
The man and his sister lived most of their lives without a mom after she abandoned them as children. At the time, she discovered she was gay and that she was no longer attracted to the siblings’ dad.
Man using a laptop | Source: Shutterstock
Her then-10-year-old son and then-four-year-old daughter never got a goodbye from her. She also never gave a proper explanation to her partner. Instead, she left a note.
In the note, she explained that she was in love with her girlfriend. She wished her partner well without even mentioning her son and daughter.
A crying man | Source: Shutterstock
The Abandonment Made the Man Hateful
When the dad told his children about what’d happened, it ignited a particular hatred in his son. Growing up, he hated the LGBTQ community because it reminded him of his mother.
However, he later realized that he shouldn’t be hating them. “It was my mother who caused pain, not gay people,” he explained.
When the man was 27, he was set to get married in a couple of months. By then, his dad remarried, and the man described his stepmother as a “wonderful individual.” Likewise, the man’s sister was also engaged.
An angry man | Source: Shutterstock
They Had Unexpected Guests at a Dinner Party
Everything was going great. One day, the man was scheduled to have dinner with his in-laws and the rest of the family at his father’s estate, only for them to receive an unexpected knock on the door.
“We received a knock on the door, and it was a random woman so I said ‘Hi, how can I help you.’” the man shared.
A dinner party | Source: Shutterstock
To his surprise, the woman introduced herself as the mother’s girlfriend. She then asked if they could talk.
Furious, the man said no and shut the door. When he went back inside, his dad asked him who it was.
Someone knocking on a door | Source: Shutterstock
He told his dad that the woman was a homewrecker. Initially, his dad didn’t understand. So, his sister further explained that it was their mother’s girlfriend.
Their dad didn’t react the way they thought he would. Rather than feeling angry, he seemed rather sad.
The man noted that it was likely the trauma coming back to his dad all at once. After everyone caught wind of the situation, they looked out the window and saw the two women holding hands.
Two women | Source: Shutterstock
They Confronted the Woman on Her Abandonment
The man’s sister couldn’t help but confront her mom. She asked why, after so many years, she decided to show up.
She then explained that she’d been in contact with one of their uncles. Through him, she discovered both her children were getting married.
Two young children | Source: Shutterstock
Then, the most unexpected thing happened: their mother asked for an invitation to both weddings. The man was in disbelief.
“You abandon your two young children for your own needs, then you hide in your car and send the homewrecker to try and have a conversation,” the man replied bluntly.
Their mother started to sob. Her girlfriend comforted her while all the older people inside the estate demanded them to leave.
Rather than an invite, the mom got a rude awakening. The man’s father threatened to call the police if they didn’t leave his property.
Not only did the other visitors tell her that her ex-partner was right to forbid contact between her and the children, but her son shunned her, too. He was glad their mother never tried to contact them as well.
After everything, the mom and her partner left, yelling at the entire family. They slammed them for being homophobic despite the effort they put into making amends.
The man wondered whether he was too harsh for asking his mother to go. He took to Reddit to seek opinions on whether what he did was right.
“She doesn’t have an invitation because she abandoned you, NOT because she’s lesbian,” one wrote.
“Where was she for the last 17 years? That’s a very long time not to be in any contact at all or not even try to contact you,” another echoed.
The man clarified that his mom tried to reach out during the first three years, but his father didn’t allow them to be in contact. However, he still believed it wasn’t enough for her to get an invitation.
“I don’t understand how so many people are defending my [mom’s] actions, thinking she just has the right to do whatever she wants,” the man said.
If you were in the man’s situation, what would you have done? Would you have tried to build a relationship with your mom, or would you have asked her to leave as well?