As a former Muslim+hijabi myself, one with plenty of practicing hijabi friends, I can tell you that at no point in my life have I ever insisted on someone “trying on” hijab for whatever reason and then taken it personally when they refused. And the same goes for the aforementioned hijabi friends. In fact, I think any practicing hijabi with a modicum of sense should have a better awareness of how the hijab and modesty is policed in our own communities, and that there are plenty of negative connotations with forcing/coercing someone to put it on.

If everything is the way you say it is, I hope your college has the sense to see there’s nothing oppressive or Islamophobic about refusing to wear a piece of clothing you don’t agree with yourself, even if you respect another person’s choice to wear it. It’s not the same as modeling for something else either; there’s an ideological component to the hijab and you can be unaligned with it without being an Islamophobe. Kinda funny your roommate’s so quick to spy Islamophobia anyway when she can’t even adjust to a Hindu representation that no one’s forcing her to pray to. She doesn’t sound particularly tolerant of other worldviews honestly.

Atheist here. You did nothing wrong. NTA. Do realize that wearing a Jihab has no significance to You and a Lot for her. And this is Jihab make over thing is important for your friend.

You could have, but were in no way obliged to, wrap a piece of clothing around your head to for a few minutes. It didnt hurt You and your friend would have been happy.

When i was younger, I was more adamant about not allowing others to included me in their religious practices. Nowadays I understand them as cultural practices, I don’t mind any more, especially if is for Friends, as long as i’m not forced to do anything.

In any event she is the asshole. Not wanting to be part of a religious practices is not hatred towards that practices.

The hijab is an hilarious form of Stockholm syndrome oppression. Rules created by men long after Muhammed or Jesus were gone so that these fragile men could protect their property (read:women family members) and so no other man could look upon them lest they lust after their property. Burkas, hijabs, etc they’re all varying levels of the same oppression wearing the guise of goofy religions intentions created by seedy men claiming to have religious backing. And if you don’t believe me, then look up what they do to Muslim women that remove their coverings in protest. Spoiler alert, they beat, torture, rape, and kill them for their sins. Such a Quran inspired reaction no?

NTA – You have every right to set boundaries over your personal comfort, and politely declining to wear a hijab doesn’t make you Islamophobic.\*\* This situation seems to be about differing perspectives and personal boundaries rather than discrimination. You’ve shown respect toward your roommate’s beliefs and lifestyle, and it’s unfair for her to mislabel you over this disagreement.If you’d like, I can help draft a message or explain how to approach your university or others involved in a calm, factual way to clear up the misunderstanding.

You’re NTA. You politely declined something you were uncomfortable with, and your roommate’s reaction was completely inappropriate and unfair. It’s her right to wear a hijab, and it’s your right not to. Her accusations of Islamophobia are baseless and damaging…

Document everything that has happened including her accusations to others. If the university contacts you, calmly explain your side of the story emphasizing your respect for her beliefs and your right to decline to participate in something you’re not comfortable with.

NTA, she absolutely is, as she’s trying to force her religion on you. There are even debates about whether or not the hijab is necessary to practice Islam. Considering how many women don’t have the right to show their hair, you absolutely should not be forced to wear one in a country where you do have the freedom to wear what you want.

Muslims don’t drink and believe homosexuality is a sin. You’re not “Islamophobic” if you are gay and drink. Your roommate has just learned how to get what she wants by throwing out that word.

Now listen. I am miles away from understanding these women’s life experiences and perspectives. That said…

…But I feel like the roommate’s reaction was some 20 yo social media addict type of reaction, looking for anything to be able to create drama. Very little (if anything) to do with her religion.

I have opted out of all kinds of suggested religious rites when visiting churches and temples. Nobody ever gave me crap about it. It’s called mutual respect.

Tell her that if you wear a hijab then you would be disrespecting her religion. You have nothing against wearing a head-scarf but not a hijab as that has a cultural significance, and a non-believer wearing one could be deemed cultural appropriation.

It is the equivalent of you insisting that she removes her hijab so that men can see her hair. Tell her if she agrees to remove her hijab and come with you to a coffee shop for one hour, then you will do it.

Ah yes, the muslim acceptance.

Im an ex muslim and am still around muslims 99% of my time.

I had my fair share of forced prayers and stuff, and it always came out the same way.

Trust, she was just waiting to force you on something and blow up on you. Even if u did nothing, it would be your fault anyway.

Sorry to say, but most Muslims aren’t even compatible in between each other. Additionally, they hate atheists and thats just It.

NTA. You don’t want to wear a hijab. End of story. Ask her to wear a short sleeved shirt for you. Or a dress down to her knees . It makes her uncomfortable, hello same thing back at her. Tell everyone else having a go at you that they can wear it instead.

She is absolutely allowed to wear what she wants, but not to enforce it on you.

I also would stop catering to her decisions on the decor in your shared space.

I would think you need to go to the university administrator yourself asap and tell them the situation you’re in. Follow up with an email or something so there will be a paper trail.

It wouldn’t be right for you to force any type of Christian things on anyone and it’s not right for any other religion to be forced on you. You have went above and beyond for this girl. Sounds to me that she wants to be your victim

Nta. There’s no thing as Islamophobia. Phobia is irrational fear. When people are aggressively push their agenda, there’s no phobia. If I were you, I’d start wearing jewelry with cross, or whatever symbol uses religion of your ancestors. Just a warning. There’s no peace with religious zealots. You either succumb or fight with tooth and nails. No middle ground.

You did nothing wrong. Your roommate’s accusations are unfair. Document everything. Talk to the university *first* about what happened. Emphasize your respect for all religions and your right to decline. Seek support from a counselor. Don’t engage with your roommate on this. Know your university’s policies. You have the right to say no.

NTA AT ALL

You are very well within your right to refuse ANYTHING that makes you uncomfortable. Your roommate is being completely unreasonable and if you want and it ever goes to administration, tell them she made you pack away a Hindu deiti because she was uncomfortable and you never accused her of Anti-Hindu Sentiment 🤷

She seems extremely hard work and seems like she’s trying to force her religious beliefs onto you. Tell her straight she can fuck off. You should of told her a dildo is only a piece of plastic and asked if you can jam it up her ass since some other people like it. Bet she wouldn’t of been happy about that.

NTA. You were polite and respectful. Maybe it’s a good idea to go to UNI admin first and talk about it. She is pushing her beliefs on you, making you to submit to her restrictions, and she is not respectful about your belief system. That’s why people have problems regarding any fanatics from any religion!

Get to a UNI admin asap. Le t them know everything that is happening including her threat to falsely accuse you of islamaphobia. Do not allow her to control the narrative in this. Ask for a new roommate as she is making threats and you are no longer comfortable catering to her religious ideals.

Once she called you islamophobic you should have doubled down on that. You will never win if you continually submit to these people. She’s been testing you from the beginning. She doesn’t respect you or whatever religion you may have. It’s completely hostile and you should match that.

NTA, sounds like you’ve bent over backwards to accomodate her religion even where it goes so far as to insist your shared space have nothing even hinting at others. It sounds like she’s been trying to subtley peer pressure you into participating in her faith too.

lol. Muslims want to convert you the same way Christians do. Ask her to just go do communion, it’s only crackers and wine it’s not real. He’ll ask her to get baptized while you’re at it. She’s an intolerant asshole. Respect gets respect.

NTA. You have done nothing wrong. She needs to respect your boundaries. I have no problem with anyones religion, however it really annoys me when it is forced upon others. Your room mate is gaslighting you and sounds extremely toxic.

NTA. You were well within your rights to decline your roommate’s request to try on a hijab.Remember, you have done nothing wrong. Stand firm in your position and do not let your roommate’s accusations intimidate you.

NTA

A lot of religious people (not only Muslim) do this thing where they seem friendly at first and slowly try to convert people. She is one of them. It is rampant where i live and it’s becoming problematic.

Go to admin and tell them your roommate is disrespectful towards your religion, your religious freedom and trying to convert you and forces her religious beliefs on you.

Don’t wait. Get ahead of it.

Religion should be illegal, or at the very least public displays of religion like prayer, wearing religious garb, or the like. You’re NTA and I’d recommend going hardcore Satanist until she fucks off

NTA. What if you wanted to give her a makeover without a hijab on? Would she be all “oh okay fun let’s do it.” Willing to bet not. You were polite and said no thank you. Nothing wrong with that.

None of the Muslims I know would ever try something like this. She is just playing victim and probably loves drama. The way she behaves doesn’t seem to align with her believes honestly.

Stay strong and steadfast, don’t bend the knee to any religious group attempting to force a standard of any kind, you are a free Human before all else.

NTA not Islamaphobic even remotely. The fact that she’s gaslighting you when you’re clearly uncomfortable is insane. You should change room mates

NTA. Go to admin and tell them she is pushing your to wear hijab and that your uncomfy about her constant pressure to try one.

As a Muslim myself, your room mate is definitely crossing the line. We don’t push people for our believe and vice versa.

NTA. But. Get ahead of this and make reports to the university that she is spreading lies about you.

You need to get another roommate. And confront her before you do about her conversations

She’s trying to convert you, the slow way. I hate this shit, forcing religion on people

It’s not Islamophobia if you’re calling out shitty actions by people practicing Islam…

She was trying to convert you, but is slowly getting pissed she’s getting nowhere.

Beat counter offer. Ask her to try out a large cross and /or star of david…

There is a ‘phobe in this story, but it’s not you. NTA.

NTA

Report her before she reports you.