Got period on boyfriends mattress and now he won’t talk to me anymore

The original poster (OP), a 24-year-old woman, experienced an unexpected early start to her menstrual period while staying overnight at her 23-year-old boyfriend’s apartment. Having only noticed light spotting the previous day, OP neglected to use protection like a tampon or pad before going to sleep.

Upon waking, the boyfriend discovered significant stains on his mattress and sheets, leading to his immediate anger and refusal to speak with OP, expressing doubt that the damage could be reversed. OP feels remorse but believes the event was unpredictable, leading her to question whether her boyfriend is justified in his strong reaction and whether she is at fault.

Got period on boyfriends mattress and now he won’t talk to me anymore

I (24F) woke up this morning and got my period a week early. I had spotting yesterday but chalked it up to missing a birth control pill and went to bed without a tampon/pad. I was sleeping with my boyfriend (23F) at his apartment.

His mattress and sheets are stained and I am working to get them out. He is mad and hasn’t talked to me for a few hours saying that he doesn’t believe the stain will come out. I obviously feel bad but there’s no way I could’ve predicted this.

And as a woman, this feels like it’s pretty low stakes. AITAH? Does my boyfriend have a right to be mad?

Here’s how people reacted:

Kasha2000UK

What sort of immature misogynistic asshat behaves like this? Hell, the silent treatment for anything is immature, but him shaming you for a normal bodily function is ridiculous – if he wants to date someone with a vagina then this is part of that, his behaviour is gross.

I blend on a boyfriends bed once, with my super heavy flow. His response was to run me a bath while he washed my clothes and his bedding, then snuggled with me on the sofa and brought me cups of tea. He wasn’t even that great of a boyfriend, but even he got that right.

amyss

Oh my God he needs to grow the F up! I remember my first marriage I was 18, he 23 and refused to buy pads or tampons because I should just “ hold it” like I would urine or poop. Seriously the school system in Texas ( this is excluding where I went, El Paso, where both sexes learned about each other’ s body. Can’t believe how many times I had to explain to grown women many already MOTHERS that they had 3 holes in the pelvic floor and men had 2.

Megaton69

My advice to anyone who is squeamish about a little blood on the sheets:

You are gonna have a bad time when it comes to having a family lol. There will be nosebleeds, barf, shit, diarrhea, food, mucus, piss and fucking every god damn disgusting fluid you can think of eventually getting on every sheet, chair, couch bed floor and other surfaces you have.

Saddle up and put a smile on your face and clean it up, that’s life buddy lol.

AppearanceAnxious102

Find a new boyfriend. It’s one thing to be upset there’s blood on the mattress. It’s another to treat you like you could help it and fully prevented it or can stop it. Periods are natural, and while we have ways of making it easier, it’s not perfect. WE as a human species are not perfect. For him to expect a mistake like this won’t ever happen is not only disrespectful but it’s highly improbable.

ZoomtheWuff

We can never fully predict when our periods will show up. So no you arent TA because not only do you feel bad but you are trying to clean it. And it will come out, you just need hydrogen peroxide and baking soda to get it up. Sounds to me like he needs to be a little more understanding of you and the situation if you ask me

Wishy666

Your boyfriend should understand this is part of the female body. It doesn’t warrant the silent treatment. My husband wouldn’t dare clean it but he wouldn’t give me the silent treatment over it. Get a new boyfriend and after you dump him call his mother and tell her why you guys broke up.

oldsoul777

What a child! Guess he never earned his wings! 😁. Tell him to go buy a new set. Is that all he cares about. Sounds petty and materialistic. I’d feel worse making you feel bad about something completely natural and watch you clean it, doubting you the whole time. Yeah fuck that.

Independent_Lab_5845

I would replace the bedding. But if he acts childish and refuses to talk to you due to a natural bodily function, why would you want to continue dating him. He is acting like a boy, not a man. A real man would accept it happen. You couldn’t control it from happening and move on.

poisonivy247

Back in my day Dads and dudes just said, “Don’t mind her she’s just on the rag”. It made us hate ourselves, cramps were just all in our heads and according to them we just needed to toughen up. Fuck that mattress and fuck him too!

Ok_Detective5412

NTA. A human being’s happiness and dignity are more important than sheets. He’s obviously not ready to be in a relationship with a human female. Throw the sheets in the washer on cold and then go home and block him on everything.

Initial_You7797

if he wants to put his dick in it, he can deal with what it does ever mnth since you were 13 and until you’re 53. this is life. sound like you need a new BF. how is he going to act when something ral happens.

SnooCrickets3313

Had he got the mattress cover they probably offered but he declined it wouldn’t be so bad However I’m a sleep specialist that can get you a cover for the Low hmu 🤷🏾‍♂️

No_Confidence_645

I think I speak for everyone here when I say, Girl, dump him. Literally do not spend anymore time or effort on this man child.

Conclusion

The core conflict arises from the difference in how OP and her boyfriend view the situation: OP sees an unavoidable biological event that warrants understanding, while her boyfriend is focused on the tangible damage to his property and his feeling of being inconvenienced or disrespected.

The central question is whether the boyfriend’s intense anger and silent treatment are reasonable responses to an accident caused by a natural bodily function, or if his reaction crosses the line into an overreaction that lacks empathy for OP’s unavoidable situation.