> From my point of view, having only my desklight on in the room makes the room dim enough to sleep

I have no idea why you think that. Sleeping is extremely difficult when there is any light in the room. I am extremely annoyed by even the small lights put on electronics, and regularly tape over them, and I am considered to be fairly insensitive to light by those close to me.

Room mate situations like this suck because it’s shitty to feel like you can’t study in your own room, but it comes with the territory. YTA, especially since you acknowledge it and say you’re still going to do it.

YTA. Sleep is vitally important to health, productivity, and comfort. His desire to sleep well at reasonable hours trumps your lighting needs. If you want to stay up super late, find a common area or restaurant that’s open 24h and study there.

Personally, I think NTA.

I had a roomie who was my best roomie ever. But I was hittin the hay around midnight and she was up 2 or 3 hours after I went to bed. She too worked. Except she worked with the light on usually. Like. The room light.

It took a bit of getting used to, but I learned to sleep with the light on or off. Didnt matter to me. And while your roomie might be different, probably he’ll get used to the desk light too. Plus, he has a sleeping mask. Thats a viable option too. Hed also get used to wearing that pretty quick.

Yta… stop.

My roommate in college was like this. She would eat chips, have the desk light on all night, keep her side a disastrous mess, and wake up late afternoon to go to class. Completely nocturnal. I wasnt good at confrontation, so I just kind of bore through it. It really messed up my health, I was tired all the time, and my grades took a hit. My friends and bf were really supportive and let me stay over whenever I wanted, but I think my hellish experience with that roommate ruined my college experience a lot. If I could turn back time, I wish I was less of a pushover then.

Edit: did tell her a few times. She would say sorry and just keep doing what she was doing

You’re a narcissistic asshole.

>Well at the end of the day I’m fine with being an asshole or disrespectful person if it means keeping my grades up. I just can’t find the same sort of concentration I have when I’m in my own personal space

All that matters to you, is you.

Yes you are. You are staying up extremely late, and everyone has different conditions that they’re able to sleep in. Many people can’t sleep with any light on at all, and desk lights are usually pretty bright. Is there anywhere else in the building you can go to get work done like a lounge?

Upvoted for being an asshole

Yes, you are the asshole. Sleep is important in university, and just because you can handle staying up until 3 or 4 am (spoiler: you might not handle it as well as you think, this is a great way to burn out fast), doesn’t mean everybody can or even should. Find a 24 hour library on campus to study at, or request a single room because you are a very disrespectful roommate.

You’re kind of the asshole. College dorms can suck, but compromise is really important for having a good roommate experience. There are common rooms for a reason, and it may suck to have to leave your own room, but you’ll probably meet a lot of people just hanging out/studying in them late at night.

If it was something like your roommate going to bed wicked early (like 7 or 8) then you’d be fine but 11 is late and 3-4 am is not reasonable.

If you absolutely must be in your room, try a book light.

OP didn’t like me calling him names so he PMed me the Marine Corps copypasta

I told her a few times but didn’t escalate it, it was senior year and I couldnt just move out in the middle of the semester. But yeah I shouldve been more assertive

YTA. You may not think the light is too bright for sleep but he clearly does. Humans need darkness while sleeping to maintain a healthy circadian rhythm. And wearing a sleep mask makes a lot of people anxious and feel claustrophobic.

YTA. if you want to stay up until that time, go somewhere that isn’t a place to sleep.

Yes, you’re the asshole.
Either find a different area to study in, or get on a human sleep schedule.
Even when I abused my sleep like that in college, which I highly do not recommend, I would do all my work in a common area, lobby, lab, or even hallways with some pillows, and only go into the room once I was ready to sneak into total darkness. That’s being a good roommate.

Edit: some people, like me, are extremely light sleepers. Any noise, light, movement, I’m instantly awake (the textural input of face mask is more hindrance than help). Asking me to sleep with you working with the light on would be like asking me to be 50% rested and 50% aware of you there, every night. I’d be exhausted and frustrated with you honestly.

Kinda. I say just move your desk out of the sleeping area (unless it’s one room).

YTA. Turn it around – if he got out of bed at 0500 and turned on the lights to study would you be happy? Or if he snored and it was loud enough to disturb you would you expect him to do something about it?

Meh most of you guys made some fairly weak arguments. Gave me some good insight on the kinds of users who hang around this subreddit though. I’ll handle the situation as I see fit 😉

YTA, sorry. Less so for attempting to mitigate, but conversely if for example, you had an early riser roommate that did jumping jacks in the room at 430am (but y’know, like, quietly), you’d probably be more than a little miffed.