Well, stop smoking for your health, but honestly, going outside is the accommodation. I would have just smoked and told the friend to mind his own business. I’d also point out, the accommodation was that his friends not be noisy and they weren’t.

I don’t like smoking either, but I am also confused how you smoking outside was going to be a problem for them.

Is there any chance you left anything out that would make this make any sense at all? If not, then clearly NTA.

NTA. If your roommate thinks their friends are allowed to police your behavior in your own damn home, then you’re allowed to police theirs. Tell them they are not allowed to make noise while you’re sleeping.

I’m a former smoker and the smell bothers me but if I go to someone else’s home and there’s a smoker there, I put up with it because it’s not my place to tell them what they can and can’t do.

NTA. In fact, I think you showed considerable restraint. I would have told him that I don’t give a fuck what he is comfortable with and gone outside to smoke my cigarette.

NTA – and please ask him WHY it’s an issue for someone to smoke outside of a home he is inside.

I no longer smoke. I have friends who still do. I wish they wouldn’t. I would even let them smoke outside at my house.

This has ZERO effect on this guy.

Look, I hate cigarette and pot smoke. They give me wicked migraines amd aggravate my lungs. But this is YOUR home. The visitor can easily leave. I probably wouldn’t allow that person back at all. The solution is for them to spend time at someone else’s home, not be jerks in yours.

NTA

NTA but I do want to point out that you made the decision to comply. We don’t have control over what other people expect. We do have control over what we decide to do. You could have just continued outside to smoke. What you actually did was reinforce the belief that it was someone else’s decision whether you smoke or not. Not complying next time will cause a stronger negative reaction now but you can still turn this around. Don’t play into the myth that you have to please everyone. That’s a weakness easily exploited.

NTA. That is outrageous.

NTA

It’s not like you’re smoking inside. Does that person tell strangers not to smoke when they’re out in public? Everyone has to deal with discomfort sometimes and you have the right to smoke outside.

NTA. It’s your apartment too, they don’t live there. You are gracious enough to not smoke inside, that accommodation is plenty reasonable for your roommates guests.

If they don’t like it, they can take their asses out the front door and leave.

NTA. Your roommate and his friends are majorly overstepping, I find the whole thing absurd and would have ignored the friend to begin with and gone outside to smoke (if I smoked.)

wow, NTA. the audacity of your roommate’s friend is *astounding*. your roommate should’ve taken your side too.

NTA
House pests, er I mean house guests, don’t dictate rules in your own home, shared or not.
Next time, go outside, close the door. Find a comfy seat and enjoy your coffee and smoke.

When they are visiting again and bring it up, you should ask them when they are going to invite you over so you can go sit outside their place a have a smoke, since if they think they can dictate rules there then you would like to do the same.

As a 20 year ex smoker, I’ll put the obligatory “disgusting habit” note here.

Then I’ll add that your room mate and his friends are so far out of line they’re bent. They’re free to tell you they’re uncomfortable with smoking, but as long as you’re not breathing smoke on them they’ve no right to even attempt to restrict your actions.

Continue to stand firm, but wash the nicotine stains off your hands first. NTA

NTA! Fellow smoker here. It is NONE of their business if you go outside to have a cigarette! NOBODY gets between me and my morning coffee and cigarette. NOBODY!

NTA!!
it’s Your space?
you can do as you please there. you’re being considerate smoking outside.
next time, spark up in the living room

NTA – neither your roommate or his friends have any control over what you do. I would have walked right past them to go outside and smoke, I wouldn’t have let them control me. You need a new roommate or you need to put your foot down right now that they will not tell you what you can and cannot do.

The point you made is that strangers can’t boss you around in your own place. His point is that he and his friends CAN boss you around in your own place. His point is invalid. Don’t ever let people tell you what to do like that. Stand your ground.

I’m a little mad that you even gave in at all. Next time laugh in their face and continue about your business. NTA

Wait, what?
First off who in their right mind thinks they can dictate rules when a guest in someone else’s home? (severe allergies etc aside)

Secondly, who disrespects a small ask such as ‘please be quiet, I have work’ AND THEN feels entitled to ask the very same person they disrespected and woke up to not smoke outside their own property?

Pal. I feel for you but sometimes you simply cannot reason with stupid.

NTA – obviously!

NTA:
You weren’t smoking inside. The friend was way out of line for suggesting that you change your behavior in your home.